The day HyunMi realizes (1/1)

December 3, HyunMi A hang-over.Two days of hang-over from our date. I still found myself sighing, daydreaming, and instead of painting on the canvas I’m just looking at it. or if I’m working, I couldn’t stop painting the broad back of a boy sitting by the riverbank of the Han River. A hang-over it is. But it wasn’t the date itself that haunted me for the days that followed. It was the inquisition that happened after the date. Strange?  Indeed. There was too much convulsion of nature I thought my world was turned up side-down and everyone was kidnapped by aliens.I mean, ugh… how do I put this… I replayed the scene in my head, trying to figure out if it actually happened. I had entered my room but did not change into my house clothes yet. I took a look at the latest painting I made—the landscape one I made for the day. I regretted that I didn’t have one last look of the painting I gave Dongwoon. “Hey,”I looked over my shoulder. “Hi.”He plopped himself carelessly on the couch, like he always does. “Tell me the story,”Instead of choosing the words and carefully picking out the events, I poured out everything that happened. The painting by the Han River, the dinner-date, and even my painting about Dongwoon, itself. Also to my surprise, Kibum listened and seldom interrupted me. He asked questions, and he was tilting his head in one side showcasing his interest. We talked like normal people talking about a normal  topic, very much unlike our usual yelling at each other and pillow fights in skirmishes. One thing that didn’t satisfy me, though, despite of his undeniably curious air there was a constant pucker on his lips and a crease in the middle of his brows. I wasn’t sure what that was, though, I disregarded it and went on with my story. “So Dujun-hyung and the others serenaded you, huh,” he snickered.“Yeah. They have lovely voices.” I agreed. “And you, what did you do for the day?”His face relaxed by .1%. “Taemin and I had a photoshoot,”“For?”“A magazine. Go buy yourself a copy, alright.”I nodded. “Yes, sir,”The moment next the air felt dull. Something was wrong, the usual dynamic atmosphere in my room was missing, and I couldn’t exactly point out why it was so. But one thing was for sure—I didn’t want it to last long. “Kibum,” I called.“I really hate being called like that, you know,”“You do? How come you’ve tolerated me all this time?”“Because you’re HyunMi.”“Huh?” I looked at him, and I was instantly surprised by the face he wore. It was an expression of someone who was tired. “What’s wrong?” I stroked his hair. It was just then that I realized that Kibum’s hair is soft. His blonde hair looked a bit damaged to me, but to my fingertips it felt soft.He sighed. “I feel weak.”“Why?”“I don’t even know why, HyunMi,” he crashed his head directly on my lap.“Hey!”“Aisshh. Stop being so nosy. I just want to rest, that’s all.”Contrary to the usual, today, Kibum seems calm. And for the nth time, very much unlike himself. Maybe he’s just tired from the pictorial. He lied there lazily, and covered his eyes with his arms to shield himself from the light. I observed him as I stroked his hair; the heaving of his chest and his perpetual biting of his lips. And while I was at it, I had a monologue with my very own mind. Sometimes I even think that my mind has a mind of its own. He must be hurt. Something at the back of my mind said.I searched for who, or whatever said that. Who said that?The voice was mute.Brain, talk to me.What.Why did you say that? Why is he hurt?Seriously, HyunMi. I am you and you are me. You should know what I mean. And, as if it were some movie player I myself didn’t operate, scenes organized themselves in a movie and replayed itself on my head. The day when I said I had a crush on Woonie. He didn’t talk to me for the three days that followed. Him being territorial about Dongwoon. His more-than-usual flirting with me for the passed few days. His reason that he’d really feel bad for Dongwoon if the latter ever decided to go out with me, which, just now, came true. Even just for a day. And whenever I ask him if he’s jealous, he’ll just turn red and harrumph at me.And lastly, his speech at the beach. “’Dongwoon’ again? Don’t you insult me by displaying how much you love that guy in front of me!”But that’s impossible. He’s just a diva born to flirt, that’s all. Was my reason with myself, but it sounded rather ridiculous, for it was like I was in a justice court presented with all evidences needed but kept denying the truth. My mouth was open. It was left hanging in the air while I was thinking.I looked at the pretty figure on my lap, and swallowed a big ball of saliva. My heartbeat went rapid, my face was warming. All I wanted to do was drop him off of me.And, as sadistic as my ‘mind’s mind’ is, a festival was going on inside my head despite of my extreme state of confusion. My mind was so noisy, so busy, my thoughts were loudly deafening I was afraid Kibum might hear it. It felt like my brain cells themselves were cheering, “She finally realized it!” “HyunMi.” Kibum called without moving.That, apparently, jarred me back to reality.“Um, yes?” I answered in a cracked voice.“You know what?”“I know…what?”“I’m jealous.”    - - - - - - - - - - -I lied, guys. I lied. But no, really. Next chapter will our OTP's date!!!1!1!!111onebecause I need this for the next chapter.btw sorry if it's short. ^^v)