Graduation (1/1)

A/N: Contains some mentions of transphobia/bullying.  “Gwiboon, honey, let’s go!” her father yelled up the stairs to her. Jonghyun flew past her bedroom door, hastily pulling on his graduation gown as he loudly clambered down the stairs. She checked her appearance in the mirror once again, dreading what today meant. Although today should have been one of the happiest in her life, she already knew what awaited her and her heart sank just thinking about it. After her conversation with Jongin in the park that day, she had been trying to reconcile her emotions and had shut herself off completely. Only Jonghyun could talk to her and even then she only really allowed him to sit with her, she didn’t actually say anything. He had first been highly frustrated because Gwiboon was his person, his beloved sister, so he just thought she was being silly by not talking to him or that she was experiencing another mood swing from her hormone treatments. But one day he had looked up after he had told her a funny story about his choir class and she had been crying silently. Her arms had been curled around herself and tears were dripping onto her chest. As he rushed over to hug her and she nuzzled her face into his neck so that now her tears dripped onto his shoulder and he could feel the silent sobs wrack her body, he became very worried about whatever it was that Gwiboon wasn’t telling him. She could feel her brother’s concern in the way he held her hand or would randomly pull her into his side, giving her arm a squeeze in the hallway between classes. One day after class she had been waiting for him outside and Jongin had rushed up to her, but she had been relieved when Jonghyun yelled at her from the parking lot and she could run away, not wanting to face her now ex-friend (and ex-boyfriend’s little brother). Gwiboon had noticed that Jonghyun had seen their interaction, but he only smiled and drew her in, kissing her forehead as he wrapped his arm around her and led her to the bus stop. The stress of keeping everything bottled up was wearing on her and Gwiboon hated seeing the paler, less put-together version of herself in the mirror. As she adjusted her hair so that her cap sat more snugly on her head, she breathed in deeply and braced herself for graduation. ~ “Kim Jonghyun,” the principal announced. He hugged Gwiboon excitedly before standing up and walking towards the stage. She smiled as she looked out to see their parents standing in the aisle, taking pictures and cooing over Jonghyun as he received his diploma and moved his tassel before walking back off the stage. Gwiboon fixed her hair and rubbed her lips together, making sure that her lip gloss was evenly spread so that she could at least appear glamorous for her parent’s photo, even if she didn’t really feel it. She watched as the school secretary handed the principle her diploma and prepared to get up from her seat. The classmate that was sitting next to her smiled and gave her a thumbs up and she nodded numbly as her name was called. “Kim Kibum.” Gwiboon’s heart stuttered in her chest as she heard her birth name called out for everyone to hear. A collective hush sank over the crowd just before a low murmuring began. Her palms became sweaty and she blinked back the tears, willing herself to remember that a name is just a name and that this name in particular is still a part of her. She rose on shaky limbs and walked down the aisle, bowing her head so that her hair covered now her face and the sea of people around her was blocked from view. Every step she took echoed in her ears as her heels clicked on the gymnasium floor. As she took the stage, she glanced to the crowd and saw her parents still in the aisle, smiling and taking pictures as if there was no hiccup. She smiled in hopes that they got at least one good picture. As she reached the principal to shake his hand and receive her diploma, someone from the audience shouted out, “Her name is Kim Gwiboon!” Gwiboon’s head snapped at the familiar voice and her heart sank when she saw that it was indeed Taemin who was standing up in the back, anger clearly written on his face. Her gaze darted back to the principal, whose hand was now holding hers more firmly, and their eyes met briefly before he looked away and broke their handshake to give her her diploma. Just as she began to move her tassel and walk away from the podium, the principal cleared his throat and spoke, “I’m terribly sorry for the error everyone. Please congratulate Kim Gwiboon as she walks off-stage.” She turned back and saw his smile as he whispered a heart-felt sorry, making her feel just a tad bit better as she turned to wave at the crowd as they all cheered and clapped for her. Maybe today wasn’t so going to be so bad after all. ~ In the hallway after the ceremony, her parents wrangled Gwbioon and Jonghyun next to the big banner “Congratulations, Graduates!”  banner for more pictures to commemorate this special day. Other families crowded in as they finished and hurried to move out of the way. Her father fussed over their diplomas as their mother tinkered with the camera, swiveling around to see where else she could take more pictures. “Aigoo, I’m so proud of you two!” their father said, beaming down at them both. Gwiboon smiled at her father and bowed her head, dismissing herself to the restroom. As she walked toward her old locker area so that it would be quieter and less crowded, she reached her favorite bathroom, the one designated as gender neutral and wheelchair accessible. This was the only place in the entire school where Gwiboon felt comfortable going to the restroom and it was almost bittersweet to think that this would be the last time she would be able to use it. After washing her hands and checking herself in the mirror, she exited to find two boys standing outside the bathroom, sneering at her. “You’re a freak, Kim Kibum,” the taller jeered, shifting so that he was leaning over her. “Wanna know why they called you Kibum and not Gwiboon, earlier? Because you’re really just a scared, pathetic little boy pretending to be a girl. You’re sick,” the other chimed in as they both moved closer until her back was against the bathroom door. Gwiboon’s heart fluttered in her chest and she began to panic as she glanced down the hallway and saw that it was completely empty. “Leave me alone, assholes,” she stated, surprised by how collected she sounded. “We just wanna know why you think you’re so special.” “Yeah, don’t you want to play with us? I mean the whole reason you pretend to be a girl is because you like boys, right?” “You two are incredibly stupid,” she huffed, her bravado now somewhat lessened as panic truly began to set in. The taller one just smiled and moved closer, putting his arms on either side of her head so that his breath ghosted over her face. His body leaned closer as the other one chuckled behind them. Just before he gets close enough that their chests are touching, Gwiboon kicks her leg up with as much force as she can muster and kicks him in the balls. Instantly, the creep is doubled over in pain and the other boy looks between the two in bewilderment. His friend is now curled up on the floor crying, cursing Gwiboon who only kicks him in his side for good measure. The other boy moved closer as if to strike Gwiboon but he is soon thrown in the air, skidding on the floor until he hits the opposite wall of lockers. “What the fuck do you think you’re doing?” an angry voice asks, eerily ringing in the quiet hallway. Gwiboon turned slightly to find Taemin standing there, his fists clenched as he breathed deeply and glared at the boy he had just thrown. His beautiful features are contorted in fury and she can’t help but bite back a sob at all of the emotions that rush through her at seeing him. “W-we were just-“ “Get the fuck out of here before I call the fucking police!” Taemin roared, kicking at the lockers as if he needs to physically let out his anger. Gwiboon sank into the wall, glad that the moment was over and she wasn’t alone anymore. As she slides to the floor, she blinked back tears and buried her head in her knees. “Hyung?” someone yelled down the hallway. Gwiboon heard people come towards them but she refused to look up and acknowledge that what had just happened was real. As more voices surround her, she hears a soft, “Noona,” whispered and the familiar feeling of Jonghyun’s arms slip around her so that she is pulled into his side. She turns into her twin and relishes in the feeling of safety that engulfs her as he tenderly takes off her graduation cap and rubs his cheek on her hair, something that he’s loved to do since they were little. Gwiboon honestly treasures the gesture but often teases him that he acts just like a puppy. Soon their father is pulling her up into his arms, reassuring her that he is going to press charges and the two boys will be expelled from school. She nodded silently and let her father and brother lead her down the hallway toward the exit. Gwiboon allowed herself one last look over her shoulder, unsure of what she would find, and is surprised to see Taemin standing there looking right back at her as Jongin says something to him and he responds off-handedly, making as if to follow her. She slowly shook her head and catches him stop in his tracks before she turned around again, having to shield her eyes from the bright sunlight. ~That night Gwiboon is sitting on her bed, ruffling through her room trying to organize the mess that she had allowed it to become. Jonghyun is talking on the phone in his room next door, so loudly that she can easily hear every word of his conversation. Halfway through her attempt at organization, she stumbles across her acceptance letter to New York University and grasps it firmly in her hands. She had decided to apply there on a whim because she secretly (maybe not so secretly) loved everything about New York City in the United States. Gwiboon had always been adept at learning languages and English was by far her favorite. It was so complex and after each year in school, she loved how she was able to understand more about the world outside of Korea. Applying to NYU had been a dream of hers ever since she had begun watching American television and learned about everything that NYC had to offer: fashion, Broadway, and the ability to be herself. Being transgender was not easy in Korea. Even though her small town of Dageu was great, save for some uglier moments like earlier today, the thought of moving to a big city in a country that was more accepting or at least more aware of everything that people like her went through was just too tempting to pass up. Gwiboon smiled to herself, truly happy after so many weeks of feeling like utter crap. She opened her laptop and began researching the university, wanting to learn as much as she could about the life she would be living in only a few short months.  She was so entranced in her internet search that she missed the multiple texts and calls she was getting until her phone had vibrated so much that it had fallen off of her desk and made a loud thunk on the floor. As she leaned over to pick it up and saw that she had 6 text messages and 10 missed phone calls, all from Lee Taemin, her heart began to beat wildly in her chest and her stomach dropped. She had been avoiding him for months and had known that seeing him today would be difficult. The thought of ignoring him now was even harder after what had happened today, how he had spoken up to correct her name during the ceremony and stepped in to help her when those two boys had cornered her outside the bathroom. Before she could make up her mind, her phone vibrated again, lighting up to signal a phone call. Sighing, she clutched the phone tightly in her hand and answered it, “Taemin-ah.”