I Need You Part 1 (1/1)

Hoya never thought that he will be friend with Myungsoo. It’s not like he hates that guy, it’s just they’re too different. They don’t look like the type that will get along well. But thing started when Hoya was 7, the day when the new neighbor move to the house next to his family house. The new neighbor is a very nice family. The father was worked in Japan and now he’s transferred back to Seoul. So he brings back his wife and his 6 years old son to Seoul. Hoya remembers the day when he shook that boy hands so awkwardly. Later Hoya’s mom spends a lot of time with Myungsoo’s mom. Just like the neighbors do. Shopping, gardening and sometime cooking some things together. Both of them getting along well. But the kids are still awkward. Hoya thinks that Myungsoo is too quiet, while Hoya is rather sassy and hyperactive. They don’t match.  So when their mother is busy with their stuffs, both boys just play awkwardly and barely talks. Until one day, surprisingly the quiet Myungsoo talks first.“Dad just bought me a bicycle.” He said awkwardly while the older boy still busy with his comic books.“Oh…”“Do you…wanna ride it together?” He asked in hesitate“Uh?” Hoya still can’t believe in the thing that he heard.“The bicycle, let’s ride it together.” The younger smile, the first time Hoya realized that his eyes have a shimmering sparkle. And that’s the beginning of their friendship. A very long friendship that’s develops from the awkward to the very close one. Because 11 years is not a short time.Things change in that eleven years. A lot of things happen to them, even though Hoya is sure, Myungsoo has been through a lot of more ‘stuffs’ than him. “So what are you going to do?” Myungsoo stares intensely to the older boy.“What I’m going to do?” Hoya answered lazily while he keeps lying down in Myungsoo’s bed.“Yeah.”“To who?”“Eunji. She’s clearly has been hitting on you. How can you ignore those letters?”“I can. And I will. I don’t like her.”“Cruel.” Myungsoo shook his head.“To be truth I don’t like college either.”“You’ve been saying that thousands times to me.”“But seriously lecturers are annoying, the girls are loud, the guy is noisy, the assignment is killing me. I’d rather spend my time with you in here all day. At least it’s quiet here.” Hoya is babbling.“Be careful what you wish for. Trust me you don’t wanna be like me.” Myungsoo smiles. Hoya realized that his smile hide a lot of thing.“How’s the therapy goes?”“Same as always. Hey, maybe I should do the things like in the movie. Make a list about the things I have to do before I die or maybe escape and have fun some where, looking for a place to die peacefully. You can go with me if you want.”“It’s not funny, Soo.” Hoya glares.“I’m joking. I’ll be okay.” He laughs.“Of course you will. You will get better. Remember, you have to be best man in my wedding.” Hoya ruffled his head.“And who are you going to marry?”“At least there’s a lot of girl like me. I’m not worry.” Yeah, there a lot of girl likes Hoya. As always, because Hoya is attractive. Hoya is funny, masculine and Hoya is likable. Myungsoo wonders why Hoya never gets into serious relationship. Sure, sometimes Hoya goes to date, but he never actually dates anyone. Sometimes Myungsoo warns Hoya that karma is exists, that he shouldn’t play with anyone’s heart. But Hoya will just laugh hard after hear that. Nurse Park com with medicine that Myungsoo has to routinely take, and that’s the time when Hoya has to leave. Hoya takes his homework books and shoved it to his purple back pack.“I only have one class tomorrow. I’ll bring you One Piece newest volume. Bye!”Myungsoo waved and Hoya walks out from the room. It is like a ritual. It’s been happen for almost 7 years. Since the day Myungsoo collapsed in the class. He was in the 4th grade and Hoya remembers how panicked people were. Myungsoo stopped attending school later. Hoya was upset because even though Myungsoo is in junior class, but he is also Hoya’s playing buddy. But at that time Hoya doesn’t understand what dying is, or how dangerous brain cancer is. Hoya just wants to play with his best friend. From that day Hoya has been visiting Myungsoo almost everyday, slowly it becomes a habit then finally become a need. For Myungsoo, especially…because he has no other friend beside Hoya. The next day Hoya comes to the room 414 as usual, but he’s greeted by the unusual sounds. The sounds of Myungsoo vomiting in the bathroom, while Nurse Park patting his back gently. Hoya just stares at the delicate figure of his friend as the nurse help him stands up. He turns around and saw Hoya stands in front of him with the plastic back filled with newest comic series. Myungsoo looks skinnier than yesterday, but his smile is just as genuine as ever. “You’re here.” Myungsoo said as the nurse help him walks to his bed. Hoya helps Myungsoo lying in the bed as Nurse Park pulls the blanket around him. Hoya bowed at the nurse as she smiles before leaves the two alone in that room. “Are you okay?”“Sure. It’s not like the first time it happened. That goddamned chemo.” Hoya just stares at his best friend, wondering how painful it is. The younger still hold on his stomach, fighting the urge to keep throwing up. It’s not the first time Hoya see Myungsoo at this state. Practically the side effect of chemotherapy is nausea and it is like draining every single energy that left in Myungsoo’s body. And later it will make him lost appetite which is becomes the reason why he looks skinnier day by day.“Don’t stare at me like that. It’s not like you never saw me vomiting before.”“I saw enough, so just rest for now. Get some sleep.”“I don’t want to. I want my One Piece now. I wanna know what happened to Sanji and Nami.”“Fine.” Hoya sighed, knowing there’s no need to argue with Myungsoo when it comes to comic books.And the rest of the afternoon spent by Myungsoo giggling at the comic books and Hoya cursing at the air because his Literature assignment is too hard to be done. Then for the thousands times Hoya will scream how he hates college so much. Two weeks later Hoya tells Myungsoo that he’s joining a dance competition. And that he’s having a beautiful girl as her dance partner.“It’s Bora-noona. Isn’t she pretty?” Hoya let Myungsoo see the girl’s picture on his phone.“Noona? She’s a noona?”“Yeah, I don’t know that I can be noona crush too. She’s the one who ask me first to become her partner.”“I thought that Dongwoo guy is your dance partner.”“Mmm…but this is couple dance competition. So I need female partner. Bora noona dance well. Besides she’s pretty hot. I think I like older woman, they’re mature and more elegant and has more experience.” Hoya grins.“Yeah, you sound like a pervert.”“What did you say?” Hoya hits his shoulder lightly.“Why did you hit me? I’m a sick person.” Myungsoo shouts. But Hoya keeps hitting, and they’re laughing like other teenager boy. A week later Hoya waits for Myungsoo in the hospital cafeteria after his dance practice, while the latter is having his routine therapy. That was the time when he realized that Myungsoo’s birthday is next week. He’s on the deep though what should he got for the younger guy. Till finally he hears someone call his name. He turns around and finds Myungsoo smiles and the sparkle in his eyes is twinkling even with that pale face.Myungsoo walks slowly towards him and then sits across the table, watching Hoya gulping his coffee.“How are you?”“Still dying.”“Soo…don’t…” Hoya glares at him. He hates the ‘death’ word.“I’m joking. You just got back from your practice?”“Yeah…and I miss you.”“Fuck you. Then what about your Bora-noona?” Myungsoo chuckled.“Getting hotter…” Hoya grins“Okay, save the detail for yourself.” They both laugh.“Your birthday is coming up.”“I know. Have you prepared anything for me?”“Hmmm…you don’t eat sweets so no cake for you. You hate cute things, so no dolls for you. You hate hip hop music, so I’m not giving CD. I gave full sets of Death Note in Christmas, so no comic or book. Maybe I shouldn’t give you anything this year.”“Cruel.” Myungsoo pouts.“What about you name it? What do you want?”“What do I want? Can you afford it?”“Only if it cost less than 30.000 won.”“Far less than that. But it quiet risky.” Myungsoo smiles wickedly. 2 PM on Myungsoo’s birthday. Hoya though his heart gonna fall out when finally he saw Myungsoo getting out from hospital’s back door. He walks to the blue car where Hoya’s in. Hoya borrowed the car from his brother, Sunggyu, only for Myungsoo’s crazy birthday wishes.“I wanna to go for photo hunting.”“Okay…where?”“Suwon.”“You’re kidding.”“I’m not.”“Soo, you know your parents won’t allow it.”“That’s why I want to escape without them knowing it. And I need your help for this.”“You’re crazy. Your dad will kill me after that.”“No, he won’t. Maybe he will just scold you.”“Yeah, and your father scolds is like Olympus wrath. Besides, why Suwon? It needs an hour drive.”“There’s a lake near the city gate in there. I read in the internet it has a really nice view. I just wanna come there once. It’s not like I can come again next year because I may not have long-““Stop.” Hoya cuts his words. He really hates the ‘death’ word. He stares at the younger that now is looking down. Hoya let out a sigh.“I’ll ask Sunggyu hyung if I can borrow car.” So now Hoya drives in silent, while Myungsoo can’t stop smiling. He forgets when the last time he can see the landscape and the road from the car’s window view. His camera is on his hand. Sometimes Myungsoo opens the window, just to feel some breeze and taking some picture. But Hoya will immediately ask him to close it, wind is not good for Myungsoo’s health.From the car stop, they still need to walks about 10 minutes to reach the lake. Hoya cursed slightly. Walk 10 minutes is nothing for him, but for Myungsoo it’s a hard work. He asks the younger if he still wants to go to the lake, since his face is seems paler than usual. But Myungsoo smiles, glittering eyes of him said that of course he wants to go. So they walk slowly through the path with pine trees grow around it. Myungsoo can’t hide his happiness, his hands is busy clicking the shutter button of the camera. Hoya walks behind him, watching the younger’s skinny back, wondering if he feels cold. Sometimes Hoya hears the chirping bird and it’s funny how he enjoyed this place. It’s amazing how Myungsoo can find this kind of place just from random sites on the internet. And the view on the lake is no joke. The lake is so clear and then sun shine makes it glowing. Hoya can see the clear reflection of pine trees on the surface of the lake. Sands on the edge of the lake, make it looks like a beach without waves. It’s just calm and beautiful. And Myungsoo is smiles while capturing some moments in there. Birds that drinking in the lake. Pine trees that shook by the breeze. The shimmering white sands. And Hoya. All beautiful scenery. That was the time when Hoya hears Myungsoo said.“Howon, thank you…”“For what?”“I’m happy…” He said with smiles, and Hoya doesn’t know that smiles will leave such an impact in his heart. Hoya hates how that smile of his best friend seems like the best scenery he ever saw. That’s the time when the sky suddenly starts turns darker. It’s about to rain soon.“Soo…we need to go back now.”Myungsoo nods and they’re on their way. Myungsoo puts his precious camera in the waterproofed bag so it won’t get wet. The air gets chiller, and Hoya walks faster. Myungsoo is not able to do so. As they walk through the path, he fell down. Hoya looks behind to finds Myungsoo on the ground, groaning and pale as sheets. “Soo? Hey…you’re okay?” He asked as he holds on to the younger wrist. Myungsoo tries his best to nod and smile, but he’s getting dizzy and his breathe gets uneven. Hoya surprise on how cold Myungsoo skins are. And the weather is no help, because small rain starts to pour.“Crap!” Hoya cursed as he crouching down, forcing Myungsoo to get on his back. Luckily he saw a small bungalow near the path. Hoya runs as fast as he can towards there. At least that small bungalow shades them from the rain. Hoya helps Myungsoo to sit. He noticed how the younger is shivering, even in the thick coat that he’s wearing. He laid the younger boy in his lap, trying to embrace him and make him as warm as possible. Later Hoya decides to take of his leather jacket and put it around Myungsoo’s shoulder. Myungsoo’s chuckled on his action.“You will catch a cold later.”“Shut up. It will keep you warm.”“I’m okay, Howon-ah…”“Stop saying that…You’re not okay! I know it, please don’t say that you’re okay when you’re not!” Hoya doesn’t know why he gets angry. Maybe because he’s tired of Myungsoo positive thought that always see everything in the positive way. Even when there’s no hope. Even when everyone else say impossible. Myungsoo always tries his best to smile, hiding all the pain in he locked inside. No one can see it, not even his best friend, Hoya. But this time it’s bursting out unexpectedly.“Then what should I say? Should I say that I feel like crap? Will it makes difference if I scream that I’m not okay? It’s not like things will get better. So why don’t I pretend that it is really okay?” Then he spills it out. All the news that Hoya never heard. That his chemotherapy gives no big results, that the cancer cells in his brain keeps growing, that he may not be able to do things as usual later and somehow it’s mentioning the ‘death’ word. Hoya wants to throw up hearing that. He mentally slaps himself for not knowing. For being a jerk, when Myungsoo is suffering. The tears that flowing from the younger eyes shinning like a glass that stabs Hoya’s heart. It hurts. But why? It’s not the first time he saw Myungsoo cry, but why this one hurt the most? And why Myungsoo looks so beautiful even in that teary and pale face? That’s when the courage building up in Hoya’s chest, when he suddenly leans his face closer towards the younger. Slowly letting his lips travelling through the salty mouth of Myungsoo. Tasting the dried tears and pale face of him that surprisingly feels so good. Myungsoo gets surprised at first, but then he can help but close his eyes, while his weak hands gripping into Hoya’s shirt. It feels like a fire, warm enough to break the cold breeze from the rain. Hoya still doesn’t get it why he does that. He knows best friend don’t do things like that. He completely aware that things might gonna be different after that. But at that time he doesn’t care, because he only saw Myungsoo. And he’s beautiful. An hour later, Hoya looks at the sleeping figure on the seat besides him as he drives. There’s a bubbling feeling in his chest as he saw at Myungsoo’s face. Hoya knows he should be worry of the doctor and Myungsoo’s parent’s anger as soon as he reaches hospital, but it seems like a small problem now. Hoya remembers when the rain stopped earlier and they were on the way back to the car stop. Hoya piggybacks the younger and he can feel Myungsoo’s head leaning weakly on his neck. Until the time when Myungsoo whispered faintly.“Howon-ah…thank you. It is the best birthday present I ever got.”“Oh…sure.” Hoya said while biting his bottom lips, tasting the salty taste of Myungsoo’s tears that left in there.