[M] Chapter 8 – It has to be (1/1)

Three months had gone by and Yunho began to worry, having not heard of a word from Jaejoong. To be perfectly honest, his entire mood had gone sour since Changmin had begun dating the guy from the movies; Geckwoon, Gikwang, whatever his name was; Yunho couldn’t have cared less. He was growing increasingly annoyed at the “couple”, a label, that Yunho felt, they hadn’t rightfully earned. To say that Changmin’s relationship annoyed him would be a drastic understatement. He couldn’t stand the fact that all they ever did was have sex and sleep, and every night this happened, Yunho would have to plug in his ear buds and drown out the disgusting sound of skin against skin, he himself not understanding how people could possibly enjoy the sound.One night, he had gone on a walk, the disturbing sound of Changmin’s nuts slapping against Gikwang’s forcing him from the house. He took a walk instead of using his headphones that night and walked to a gas station to buy a sport’s drink for the walk home. When he’d finished his transaction, he went outside and sat on the curb for a moment, watching as cars passed. He felt his phone vibrate in his pocket and checked the screen to see if he needed to answer or not. His heart literally stopped for a moment when his old lover’s name flashed repeatedly on the screen. He stared at it, unsure whether to answer, but when he finally flipped the phone open, he’d been too late and the call ended, sending Jaejoong to his voicemail.He waited anxiously to see if he left a message, and when the light lit up, indicating that he had, in fact, left a message, he flipped his phone open immediately and pressed the call button to listen to the message.Yunho-ah, I’m sorry for all the trouble I’ve caused. I-I’m sorry I drank that night, I just couldn’t beliebe- believe… I couldn’t believe what Changmin had said. And then you didn’t say anything when… When he…He could hear the quiet sobs as Jaejoong’s voice broke and he paused, seeming unable to finish, but summing up his entire message with one statement that practically sent a wrecking ball to the Great Jung Yunho's heart.Yunnie, I’m so sorry.Listening through the entirety of Jaejoong’s message, he could hear that he had been drinking, and if not for the fact that his message was thick with remorse, he would have chuckled at this. Jaejoong may not have been able to tell, but as he spoke, his words slurred with the alcohol, and Yunho easily detected it.From then on, Jaejoong called every night for a week straight, each time, heavily intoxicated, and waking up the next day without remembering anything.  Yunho tried ignoring the calls, but every time he listened to the messages he left on his phone, he grew increasingly addicted to hearing Jae’s adorable voice over the receiver.Then one night, he decided to answer.“Jae?”Yunho-ah, I’m sorry.“I know, baby, I know.”Yunnie, why won’t you come back to me?“Jae, I can’t now; I… I waited too long babe.”Why did you wait, Yunnie? Can’t you hear my heart? “Jaejoong I know you miss me but after everything, don’t you think it’d be better for you to just forget about me? Your heart can’t be mine if you kill yourself…”Who told you that, Yunho? Never mind; it doesn’t matter. “What do you mean baby?”I only did it because I didn’t want to hurt anymore. Just like now. And you hate me, so I didn’t think it would make much of a difference if I was gone. “You mean, you… You really did try to…”Yunho was at a loss for words, and more to the point, he couldn’t believe he hadn’t known about this. Changmin’s mom had been a therapist, yes, but she was also a nurse at the hospital. She had to have told him and the fact that Changmin hadn’t mentioned it infuriated him.I took a bunch of pills and downed them with vodka, but it didn’t work because Junsu found me too early. I should have locked the door.Jaejoong began to weep and Yunho felt a tear run down his cheek as the realization of what he’d caused hit him with the force of a force of a car going two hundred miles an hour into a cement wall.“I’m sorry, Jaejoong, I didn’t mean for that to happen; I… I don’t hate you, Boojae. I could never hate you baby.”Yunnie, Jaejoong said hesitantly, still weeping into the phone.“Yes, baby?”Did you ever love me, or was that a dream?“Jae, I never stopped.”Jaejoong was silent and Yunho was sure that somehow, their hearts both rejoiced as he spoke this aloud, though Jae's heart had been a bit less enthusiastic. Who could expect anything different from something that has been suffocating and drowning for four months?Jaejoong whimpered slightly and sobbed, realizing that in the morning, he wouldn’t remember any of this.Yunho-ah;“Yeah baby?”Will you go to sleep with me? Tomorrow morning, I won’t know that you answered tonight. “Of course, Jaejoong; I miss holding you at night, baby. My new bed’s so empty without you.”Jaejoong had lay down atop his lover’s old bed and tried to sniff the pillow again, frowning in dismay when all he smelled was stale cigarettes.I miss your scent. Your bed doesn’t smell like you anymore ever since I started smoking… Your clothes don’t either. Is it weird that I used to smell them all the time, Yunho?The fact actually touched Yunho, and he shook his head, though no one could see. “No, baby, it’s not. Do you want one of my shirts I have now? I don’t mind sending you one.”Jaejoong was silent again, and the tears restarted, falling onto the tobacco scented pillow.Will I get to see you if you do?As much as Yunho wanted to say yes, he couldn’t. “Jae, I can’t promise that. If I were to show up suddenly, things would get complicated more than they already are.”Jaejoong nodded, having already known the answer the minute he asked, and sighed.I really would like to have your scent again, Yunnie. “Then you’ll have it,” he promised, and mentally made plans to leave it somewhere where his lover could find it, without having to try to remember this night. “Do you have a pen and paper? Write this down.”~That night, Jaejoong fell asleep talking to Yunho, and two hours after he’d succumbed to unconsciousness, Yunho finally hung up. The next day, Jaejoong woke late in the afternoon and stretched his stiff body from tightness ensuing after the restless sleep. As he did every morning, he reached for the pack of cigarettes on the nightstand and then patted his pockets for his lighter, finding that instead, there came a rustling from beneath the fabric. He pulled out the slip of silver paper that originated from a cigarette pack, and read the words on the white side, wondering how they came to be.Go to Fourth Avenue; beneath the eighteenth rosebush on the left. Of course, immediately, Jaejoong’s curiosity sprung him from the bed, causing him to drop his cigarettes entirely. Smoking this morning could wait. He didn’t know what was in store for him at the location, be he wanted to find out. Something about the mysterious slip of paper made him feel excited, one of the many positive emotions he hadn’t experienced in a long time.He ran to his room and threw off the clothes he wore, donning a grey long sleeved, hooded t-shirt and a pair of white skinny jeans, slipping his Vans on after. He went downstairs, then, too eager to sit and eat something, and grabbed a banana from the fruit basket from one of his fans that found out he had been going through a rough time.Yoochun looked up from the book he was reading in the living room and stood up to go see what was going on. He walked in to find Jaejoong practically deep throating the banana, not knowing that the man was just trying to finish quickly so that he could go see what the note in his pocket was. Yoochun folded his arms and leaned against the door frame, observing as Jaejoong looked back at him with wide eyes, dressed in his own clothes.“Jae, what… What are you doing?” He laughed.Jaejoong gulped the bite down, wincing as he realized he hadn’t crushed it enough and almost choked on it, but swallowed, nonetheless, breathing deeply before answering. “I’m eating.”Yoochun chuckled and tilted his head. “Alright, smart ass; what are you dressed up for? Do you have a date?”Jaejoong could hear the hope in his friend’s voice, but he shook his head with a smile. “I don’t think so. I don’t know what I have. I just know I need to go to a secret location and then when I get there, I’ll know.”Junsu walked in then, having come back from the market with fresh produce. Jaejoong looked in the bags and snagged an apple, tossing it into the air lightly and catching it. “Thank you Junsu.” He laughed, and ruffled the man’s hair before stepping outside, feeling the rays of the sun caressing his arms and cheeks. He decided to walk because of the nice weather, and in forty minutes, he had made his way to the correct street. This street was mainly used for parades and auto shows, and didn’t have houses on either side, but instead, a long row of rosebushes on each side.Jaejoong counted down the rows and walked down the middle of the street as the number went from single digit to double digit, and when he reached eighteen, he hurried over to the bush on the left, practically diving beneath it. Anyone who saw would think he was trying to catch a squirrel. They wouldn’t know he had spotted an elegant white gift box, layered in a soft plush with a satin ribbon tied neatly around it.He pulled the box out from beneath the plant and looked around to see if there was anything else there, but finding that there was nothing. Jaejoong didn’t open the box until he had sprinted home, into the house, up the stairs, to his room, and slammed the door shut with a force that could only be the product of so much anticipation. He quickly threw himself onto his bed and untied the decorative ribbon, discovering a latch beneath it, at the front of the box. He flipped it quickly and opened the lid, sucking in a large gush of air through his nose in anticipation, bombarded with the strong aroma that he hadn’t had the pleasure of enjoying in months. A quiet moan escaped from his lips as the scent traveled from his nose to his tongue, down into the pit of his stomach. He felt an odd sensation resulting from the inhalation of this aroma and realized what it was with a shock.Who could have predicted that after such a long separation from his lover that his scent would be enough to strike up an arousal?He tried to focus his attention elsewhere to wait for it to go away, but then realized something that should have been painfully obvious from the beginning.This box wasn’t the source of the scent.It was what the box held that was.Jaejoong finally opened his eyes, not even realizing he’d closed them, and finally saw the shirt, along with a note inside.To my Boojae:You most likely don’t remember talking to me last night, so I’ll keep this simple. I love you Jaejoong. Please don’t do anything reckless that could hurt you. Once everything blows over with the companies, and TVXQ comes back together, I’ll be by your side again. Please, for me. Stop smoking and put the bottle down.-Forever yours,Yunnie-------------------------------------N/A: OH GEEZ so this was rated mature because of the beginning, jsyk >.<Just so we're clear, all of the above was not a dream.Hopefully you see why Jaejoong would think it was lol  I really hope those of you who read this like the story thus far.Comment if you have opinions or thoughts ^_^