➳8➳ (1/1)

I wake up with aches from every limb I could imagine. Inspecting my body; although I could barely open my eyes, I find scabs covering the surface of my arms. I flashback to last night and remember the horror scene.  Normally, when I wake up, I'm at Baekhyun's apartment; not today. I groan from pain and pick myself up from the uneven concrete ground. I try to find an exit but, I'm hopeless. "Baekhyun?!" I call for him to find me, it doesn't work. Where ever I am, I don't like it. Non-stop, I am searching for a door; almost about to give up, I see a crack in the wall. I couldn't help but grin and run to the door, pulling it open.  The brightness from the sun blinds me. The warmth burns my cuts. This place looks familiar; it's behind Baekhyun's apartment! I run to the staircase inside and head up 5 flights of pain. Although the pain is excruciating, I fight through it because I know I will be in Baek's inviting arms soon enough.  I walk down the brightly lit hall looking for apartment 508. The door stood out more than the others did, even if they were all the same dark burgundy colour. This walk seemed never ending. I think I'm getting closer but, at the same time I've been walking this short distance for too long. I hear the children from the other houses laughing and playing, it makes me fall into a minor depression. I wish I could've had a childhood like that. I was unfortunate to have a horrible father, one who didn't love me. He didn't even want me alive I'm sure of it. It makes me think, if my father wasn't the way he was, would I be how I am now? Would I ever be with Youngnam in the first place? Would I be in this much pain? If my father was loving, I would have friends, I would've never gone to jail. My life wouldn't be anywhere near how it is now. I shouldn't completely blame him; it was my fault too. I fell in love with Im Youngnam. I made all of this occur, not my father. I just thought how he treated me was right. When I met Baekhyun, he made me feel special and not like a piece of scum. Baek was an angel who came down to show me what is love and what love should feel like. I reach his door and knock for him to let me in; no answer. His apartment sounds silent; no one is home. My spirit stays miserable as I slide down the wall and sit on the carpeted floor. Waiting for Baekhyun to arrive, I continue my thoughts, blaming myself for everything. The elevator opens and closes countless times, making me assume that Baekhyun is here. After 5 more arrivals from people who aren't Baek, the elevator opens and I don't even bother to look. The scent of this person becomes stronger with every footstep. "Baekhyun?" I say while swinging my head up to take a glance.  "Uh, Eunjoo. I see you've made it back here." Baekhyun says while pulling out his keys; not making eye contact. "Baekhyun, I'm sor-" I say while rising off the ground. "I'm sorry." Baekhyun stops and stares at the floor. "Huh? Baekhyun I-" "It feels like you have transmitted your pain over to me; I can't live like this." "Are you okay?" "Remember when I sang you that song? Those feelings are still here. I never stopped loving you for one minute." "I love you too..?" I am so puzzled by his sudden words. "This isn't working, Eunjoo." "But I lo-" "You deserve better love. There is someone better out there for you, someone who can deal with this. I'm sorry but I cant handle this bullshit anymore. I can't protect you like a real man should. Eunjoo, please never forget me, I loved you, and I still do. It kills me to say this. A pretty girl like you shouldn't cry over a guy like me or a guy like Youngnam. Just promise me, even though we aren't together, don't go back to Youngnam." Baekhyun continues to interrupt me. "Baekhyun, what are you saying?" I can feel the pain in his heart. My eyes begin to fill with tears with every word he lets slip from his mouth. "I won't ask for forgiveness, because I have made your life harder. When you find a guy, I want to meet him. I want to make sure he isn't a coward like me. Eunjoo, you deserve more than this. Don't be sad because, I'm not worth it." A tear falls down his cheek as he says his final words to me. "Tell me, were you happy being his girl instead of mine?" He chokes up with such words. Is he breaking up with me? What about everything we've done together? It's my fault. He wouldn't have to live like this if it wasn't for me. I ruined his life. It was me. With an enraged feeling, I said "yes, I was happier with Youngnam. I loved the time we spent together but Youngnam expressed himself in many more ways than you ever can. Baekhyun, you are a poor excuse of a man." I walk away with tears falling down my cheeks. I kick myself for letting such foolish words slip from my mouth. My last words to Baekhyun, were all a lie. I hate myself for making him feel like an asshole. I wish I could turn back time. While I open the door to the staircase, I hear Baekhyun fall to his knees and sob, cupping his face with his gentle hands, like he once did to mine. His whimpers filled the air and were hell to my ears. I wanted to run back to him and love him, but he doesn't want my love anymore. I need to stay strong and ignore his weakness; I need to show that I am strong too, although all I want to do is collapse and weep. Very short chapter, I know. I'm so evil I know ;) THAT WAS LAME LOOL-krisbaek90