[M] Chapter 11 (1/1)

Gikwang’s positivity lasted him a good few weeks before fizzling out, leaving a string of aches pains and mood swings behind. Now at week thirty-two of his pregnancy, the boy was still doing his best to stay strong, but it was dragging his mood and energy down immensely. He felt heavy; his baby bump growing bigger and weightier all the time. The only thing that was still lifting his mood was Dongwoon, who had become closer and closer to him over time. Of course everyone else in the house were still lovely and were helping him with whatever he needed, but Dongwoon had that something that kept him smiling, no matter how down he was feeling. He supposed it was just the older boy’s natural kindness and the fact that he was always there to listen if he wanted to talk to someone. Also, it helped that except for little Taecyeon, Dongwoon was the only one who treated Gikwang exactly the same as he did sixteen weeks ago. He sat at the kitchen table, sipping on water and miserably shovelling rice into his mouth- the only thing he seemed to want to eat constantly. He wasn’t sure if he was going to be able to get off the damned chair again or not, but he was too weary to care. Dongwoon walked into the room to get a drink and smiled at seeing the teenager already sitting there.“Hey, Kwanggie!” he said cheerfully, pouring water into a cup before pulling a chair out from beneath the kitchen table and sitting next to him. Gikwang smiled around his mouthful of rice and waved. “Eating rice again?” Dongwoon asked, chuckling. The younger boy nodded and swallowed.“It’s the only thing that doesn’t make baby go crazy, I swear!” he complained, but he was still smiling. The older boy laughed and brushed a stray lock of hair out of Gikwang’s eyes. He looked at the younger properly, comparing the teenager in front of him to the skinny, pale, sickly one that had been brought to his house in the middle of the night all those weeks ago. Sleep and food really had worked miracles on the boy.“You’ve really filled out since coming here. I feel so much better now that you’re healthy, and you look really good, too. Not that you didn’t when you first came here, but I like knowing you’re stronger- besides, your cheeks are so cute all chubby.” He complimented honestly, making Gikwang blush.“Chubby? Woonie, I’m huge!” he exclaimed, making the older laugh so he could hide his pink cheeks. “I feel like I can’t even move because of how fat I am. Not to mention that baby here seems to enjoy kicking me a lot.” He said it fondly, putting his hand on his stomach and feeling that constant reminder that the baby was alive and very much active.“Awww. Well, this kid is going to be an energetic little thing!” Dongwoon commented. He turned to the big baby bump and lowered his head so his mouth was centimetres away. “Don’t give your eomma too much of a hard time, little one.” He said softly. He looked back up at Gikwang. “Can I have a feel?” he asked. Gikwang nodded so Dongwoon excitedly pressed his warm palm to the bump, smiling and gasping a little when he felt the baby kick. “It’s just the most wonderful feeling..” he breathed.“Easy for you to say!” Gikwang exclaimed jokingly. “Little one isn’t always demanding something from you!”“Ah, but another cute little guy is- and no, I don’t mean Taecyeon.” Dongwoon replied, sticking his tongue out. Gikwang narrowed his eyes.“Son Dongwoon, I will kill you.”“You love me really.”“Nope.” Gikwang stuck his bottom lip out. Dongwoon bent back down to the baby bump.“Does your eomma love me?” he asked the baby. “Oooh, Gikwanggie, baby here tells me you’re lying. Little one says that you think I’m the best guy in the world.” He paused for a second. “Oooh, what’s that, little one? Your eomma thinks I’m extremely handsome, too? Awww, I’ll make sure to thank him.”“Babo!” Gikwang giggled, pushing Dongwoon away. The teenager rolled onto his back on the Tuesday night of week thirty-four, groaning. He hadn’t slept properly for days due to the perpetual aching of his back and heartburn stabbing at his chest all the time. He sat up in defeat, eyes snapping open with irritation and his arms folded across his chest. He glared into the dark room, cursing his body for keeping him awake yet again, but giving his baby bump a loving rub anyway.Dongwoon, who was sleeping on the other side of the huge bed, stirred upon hearing the sounds of unbridled discomfort Gikwang was emitting. He never slept well when the younger boy was tossing and turning either, so he sighed and opened his sleepy eyes.“Kiki? Are you ok?” he murmured.“What do you think?” Gikwang snapped grouchily. Dongwoon sat up and moved closer to the teenager, wrapping his arm around his shoulders and resting his head on top of the younger’s.“I think that you’re tired and that baby’s hurting you again.” He mumbled gently, not wanting to anger the boy further. He played with the glossy black strands of hair on the back of Gikwang’s neck. The boy sighed again and relaxed into Dongwoon, feeling sick and tired of everything.“I’m just so frustrated, Woonie.. I can’t sleep, I can’t move- hell, I can’t even breathe without something hurting me.” He said, feeling tears start to drip down his cheeks from the irritation of not even being able to get his mood straight.“I know, Kiki, I know..” Dongwoon tried, wiping the tears from the boy’s chubby cheeks  with his thumb.“No you don’t! You don’t know anything!” Gikwang hissed, suddenly stiffening up and angry again. Dongwoon kept a firm grip on him, showing the younger that his attitude wasn’t going to deter him. Eventually, he gave in and cuddled up. “I’m sorry, Woonie. I don’t know what’s wrong with me. I-I can’t seem to control anything. I don’t mean to be h-horrible..” he sobbed into the older boy’s shoulder, his chest tight from the overload of emotions.Dongwoon just held him close and let him cry until his eyes drooped with sleep, whispering that it was ok, he understood and that Gikwang couldn’t be horrible if he tried. The younger fell asleep on his shoulder, snuffling from his tears and the headache they caused. The next day was even worse for the short teenager, as he felt more down than he ever had. He dragged his body around the house, only speaking to say hello to Mrs. Son, her husband, or Narsha. His usually bright eyes were puffy and had black circles under them and his plump pink lips were cracked and bleeding from where he had bitten them. He was drained and was struggling more than ever to find something to be happy about.Also, Doojoon made his way into his mind more often than he had done for a while. He worried that he was being disloyal by being friendly with Dongwoon and the guilt in his chest hurt more than all the aches and pains he was feeling. Gikwang was also anxious that Taecyeon and Narsha had forgotten all about Doojoon, seeing as they never talked about him and he seemed to never even cross their minds. This hurt, too. He didn’t want Doojoon to have been forgotten, the mere thought bringing fresh tears to his eyes. He walked into the garden and sat on the bench there to cry, while the pink petals of the cherry blossom tree fell in time with his tears.Narsha, Taecyeon and Mrs. Son watched the boy through the window in the kitchen. Mrs. Son frowned, hating to see the boy so upset. Narsha nibbled her lip, wincing as it tore and the metallic taste of blood spread over her tongue.“Eomma, is this normal? Should he be so sad?” she asked Mrs. Son anxiously. Mrs. Son smiled sadly.“Not everything is textbook, dear. There really is no ‘normal’ for humans, especially during times like pregnancy. You can’t document every single feeling someone has just in case another goes through the same, that would be impossible. However, what he is feeling is definitely natural. Just think of everything he’s dealing with, not to mention his age. Sometimes people have to be sad, but he will be happy again.” She explained, her voice soft. Taecyeon nodded slowly but bounded outside, sure that he knew something that might help his hyung.The little boy rushed over to his hyung, sliding next to him on the bench. Gikwang choked down more sobs, frantically wiping his eyes to get rid of the painful tears. It had been a long time since he had broken down and cried, but Taecyeon wasn’t shocked.“Taec.. I don’t.. I don’t want you to see me like this.. again..” the teenager hiccupped. Taecyeon shook his little fluffy head.“No, it’s ok, Kiki hyung.” He chirped, wrapping his tiny arms around as much of Gikwang as he could.“You’re so small, Taec. I should be comforting you..”“I’m not small! I’m big. Dongwoonie hyung said so.” Taecyeon insisted proudly. “And you don’t need to comfort me. You’re the sad one.” He reasoned.“Ah, Dongwoonie hyung.. You really like him, don’t you?”“Yep! You do too, hyung. I’ve seen how you look at him.”Gikwang blushed deeply. “Doojoonie-“ he started helplessly.“Doojoonie hyung loves you, Kiki! But, he’s not here anymore.” Taecyeon said miserably. “I miss him a lot, too. He would want you to love Dongwoonie, promise!”“How can you be so sure-?”“I went to see Doojoonie when he was sick..” Taecyeon whispered. Gikwang’s teary eyes widened.“You did?” The little boy nodded. Gikwang gasped. “What did he say?”“He said he knew he was dying, but that I should be a brave boy and look after my Kiki hyung! Then he said he loved you and that I must tell you that he never wanted you lonely. He said he would be watching from the sky and that he would be sad if you didn’t find anyone else, because someone like you should be shared and not kept all for him.”Gikwang’s mouth turned up into a smile as tears dripped down his sodden face.“Then he told me that he was sorry he couldn’t be there to look after you and take you on adventures like he promised. He said that you should take yourself on adventures and never let anyone hurt you, because he would come back and haunt them.”Gikwang giggled through his sobs.“I’m not sure exactly what words he said, Kiki hyung, but he said that you would be a beautiful husband to anyone and you should never forget your first amazing love you had with him, but to never let it hold you back. Then he said be strong and always be you because you’re perfect as you are. He asked if I could remember all that and I said yes, but I don’t know whether I did it right..” the little boy’s bottom lip quivered as he thought he had let his hyungs down. Gikwang pulled him onto his lap, which was hard because of the bump that threatened to push the little boy right off.“You did it just right, Taecyeonnie. Thank-you.. so much..” The teenager said, cuddling the infant. Taecyeon stopped worrying and smiled, letting himself be snuggled. “Doojoonie would be so proud of you, Taec.”“And you, Kiki hyung!”“You won’t ever forget him, right?” Taecyeon’s eyes widened.“No, never!” he cried, shocked.“Good. I would hate to think that he was ever forgotten. I’m so glad you went to see him when he was sick. You remembered it all so well, too. You have no idea how much better I feel now that I know he is thinking of me...”“Do you still feel sad?” the little boy piped up.“A little, but not nearly as bad as before, thanks to you.” Gikwang replied, smiling and wiping his tears with his sleeve. Taecyeon cuddled into the big baby bump, giggling when the baby kicked.They sat on the bench together, not saying anything and just hugging like their lives depended on it. Gikwang felt like the little boy was incredibly mature for his age and it was nice to be able to talk to him, even if he was nine years younger. It was a huge comfort that he had Taecyeon to cuddle and he was reassured by Doojoon’s words that he could be strong and that he could be happy without feeling guilty. He still felt heavy and he knew the weeks ahead would only get tougher, emotionally and physically, but those few words gave him that little bit of strength to push on.“That boy really is a miracle.” Mrs. Son said, her heart warmed by the sight of the boys looking a lot happier than they did five minutes ago. Narsha hummed in agreement.  A/N: Hello~ here you are! :D enjoy~~