my aching heart (1/1)

-your POV- I headed back to my room.  I made sure that the door was locked. Maybe Onew will come inside my room when I’m asleep and sleep beside. I don’t want that to happen again!I keep on laughing while remembering what we’ve done yesterday— but a little later, I started crying.I know I just committed a sin. It’s so immoral to have a sexual intercourse with a man especially when you’re a nun.I kept on crying the whole night but I was silent so Onew won’t hear me sobbing. It was already 3am when I fell asleep. The next morning, mother Dolores knocked at my door.“____, Jeju is indeed a beautiful island!”“Really? So, what do you have for me?” mother Dolores and I are so close that I can joke around with her. She handed me something. “A bag of dried mangoes? Oh, this is so sweet! Thanks a lot mother Dolores!”“I hope you’re not regretting you didn’t come with us.”“I’m fine! Hehe-““Let’s go out now and eat breakfast!”“HUH?” I didn’t want to come out. I’m avoiding Onew. “I’m not hungry. Maybe later this lunch, I’ll go out.”“So you’ll be staying here all day?”“Yes. I’ll be meditating. Eat your breakfast now. Eat a lot!” I winked at her and she smacked my butt. When mother Dolores went out, I started crying again remembering the mistake I’ve done.I lied again in bed and covered myself with the pillow. Afterwards, I started kicking the wall and hitting myself. Then, I doze-off to sleep. I was awakened by a strong knock on the door.“____? ____!” Hearing the voice of the person, I can recognize that it was Onew at the door. I stood up and checked if the door was lock.I sat on the floor, covering my mouth so he won’t hear me crying.“____, open up.” I still didn’t open the door.“I’m sorry Onew. Avoiding you is the best way to solve this problem.” I keep on saying those words on my mind.“____ please? I want to talk with you before I go. ____---““Oppa, leave unnie alone. Mother Jasmine said, she’s meditating right now.” It was Hyun-ae“meditating?” he asked.“She said, when one’s meditating, he/she has done a really serious sin.”“Ohh—““yes. You’ll see her next weekend again. They’ll be leaving next Monday.”“Ok. Fine. When she wakes up, tell her to take good care of herself ok?” Finally, he went out. I peeped on the window and saw him go away. It made me cried even more.After he left, I went out of my room and Hyun-ae meet me. “unnie! Oppa said take care of your health!” She hugged me tightly.“Yes I will.”“Let’s eat lunch?”“SURE!” After we had our lunch, I had a talk with mother Jasmine.“We can go home together.”“Yes. But I wanted to go home ahead. I miss my family. Seeing Mrs. Lee’s family makes me jealous. It makes me want to see my family more.”“Fine, fine. So when are you going home?”“Can I go home tomorrow?”“Tomorrow? Too soon! Can you go home all by yourself?”“I can.”“I’m just worried. Ok. Pack your bags now.” I went to my room and started packing up my stuffs.Going home is the best way to avoid him. I love him but this is so wrong. If they found this out, I’ll be in a great shame. My family will be on a great embarrassment!Well, only my family knows that I entered the convent. My aunties and uncles and my cousins don’t know that I’m a nun. But still, I’ll cause them a major embarrassment. ** “So, we can’t stop you, can we?” Mother Salvacion said.“I’m sorry Mother but I really miss them!”“It’s fine! Be alert, ok? God bless you!” Mother Dolores said.“Unnie, how about oppa? Does he know you’ll be going home already?” Haneul asked.I didn’t know what to say. “I think so? Send him my regards. Alright?”“I will! We’ll miss you!” Haneul and Hyun-ae gave me a big hug. It made me cry.“Good bye! Mrs. Lee, thank you for everything! You’re so blessed to have wonderful children. God bless you!”She gave me a hug and said, “If you’re not a nun, I would want you to become Jin Ki’s wife.” I bit my lower lip to prevent myself on crying.“He’ll find a wonderful wife soon. Please take care of yourself. Thank you and goodbye!” As I started to walk away from them, I was walking away from Onew. I’m escaping on the consequences that will happen. Onew will thank me soon for leaving him and forgetting for what happened to us. I was wiping my tears that was rolling down to my cheeks.“Good bye Korea—Good bye jakiya!” We landed on the capital city of our country. Our home is far, far away from here.I planned not to go home yet because I felt ashamed of myself.I stayed on the house of my cousin, which is a nurse and was 10 years older than me. She was single so it’s only me and her at home.“Why didn’t you continued studying?” She was nagging!I can’t tell her I was a nun. It was a secret. So I have to lie.“I’m sick. Papa said I have to rest..”“For 5 years? Come on!”“Because he said so.”“What happened to you?”“I- umm.. I had, leukemia!”“Leukemia?”“No- I mean, pneumonia. Yes. Pneumonia. Teehehehe”“So what brought you here?”“I missed my favorite cousin so I planned to visit youuuu!” I gave her a big, tight hug!“I missed you too!!!” We had dinner—“So, how long will you stay here?”“For a month?”“Can you stay for a year?”“I can’t! I miss my family!”“But you’re just with them last week!” Oh yes. She didn’t know I was from Korea.“Even though. I still miss them!” 3 weeks passed and I felt like I grow bigger. Yes. I was fat.“Staying here with you made me fat!” I told her. Not only that. Every morning, I’ll vomit and I have this terrible mood swings!I was also craving for foods like a durian that does not smell foul and whatever.My cousin would always give me what I want. Because, if I won’t have it, I’ll cry so hard. “Maybe you’re pregnant.” She started a serious talk that made me froze-“W-why did you say so?”“Your actions says it all. So tell me ____. Did you had sexual intercourse with someone?”“What?”“You can’t lie to me. Remember I’m a nurse and when it comes to things like that, you can’t hide it from me. You better tell me the truth.” I know right. I shouldn’t have paid her a visit! I’ll be caught!“Y-yes…”“WOW! I wasn’t expecting you to do that. You’re so dedicated on your studies but still, you did that already. So, with whom?”“Who else but with the man I love!”“Your boyfriend??” Can I call Onew my boyfriend?“No. With a friend.”“Ai ____! You should have done that with your boyfriend! Not your friend!”“But I don’t have a boyfriend!!”“Eiisshh—tomorrow, we’ll go to an ob-gyn. You have to have a check-up. TSK! I’ve been caught! T_T  -Onew's POV-  It’s been 1 month since ____ left me from the blue.Why did she leave me alone?  3 weeks ago, Hyun-ae called me just to inform me that ____ went home ahead of mother Jasmine.Upon hearing the news, I cried hard and thought that she regretted what we did.If you’ll ask me, if ever she’ll get pregnant and whatsoever, I’m ready to take responsibility of the child. But still, she left me! I still go home on weekends but not like the last time that I’m going home every weekends. I’ll always stay on our balcony and thinking of her. Mom caught me wandering.“Jin Ki, what’s wrong?”“Nothing mom. I’m fine!”“____. If she wasn’t a nun, I wanted her to be your wife.”“But she’s a nun.”“Uh-huh. By the way, Jin Ki, you’re getting old! Your dad and I are getting old too! When are you planning to give us a grandchild?”“Mom!!”“I’m serious. Are you dating any girl?”“Mom, my heart is only for one girl.” I started to cry and mom gave me a hug.“Who’s the girl? Tell me son.”“She’s ____.”“____? But she’s a nun!”“I know. But we had sexual intercourse already.”“W-what? W-when?”“When you were in Jeju. I went home and found out that it was only the two of us so I thought, it was the good time to confess to her.”“But, she’s not here.”“Because she’s regretting she did that with me.” I cried my heart out. It was the best way to cure my aching heart— --------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- a/n: Hello! How was the chapter? ^^ Please comment and subscribe. Thanks!