Dear Love, Wherever You A (1/1)

Dear Love, wherever you are. Shim Han Ji. A determined, up-to-date, independent self. Walking from the door of the office's director's room to the elevator with confidence, head's up, a big smile shown upon her face, greeting people walking past her along the way.The best day would be when I eventually meet you, but today, I had a blast. The fifth level. After pressing the button "5", she placed herself on the, according to her, most comfortable spot in the elevator. The rectangular big metal box brought her up, a "ding" sounded before the doors opened a way, for her to walk to her soon-to-be workroom. A new immense spirit ran through her blood, and with a doubtless grip, she opened the door.A promotion, to be exact. Han Ji looked around the room, a tremendous feeling of pleasure and surprise filled her heart. Walking in, she noticed her desk had been placed next to the window, not facing, not with its back to the window, as she had requested. The wall had been painted green, her desk being dark wooden brown and her chair being bright red.I don't know what happened to my boss' head during the weekend, but I would guess he was pretty impressed with what I did to the new rubric of the magazine. She tried out the chair, tilting it back and forth, playing with the height settings and moving it around the room. The wheels rolled so smooth, and the attitudes of childishness that had been kept inside her just suddenly broke out, and conquered the air. Han Ji went back to her desk, with her body still attached to the chair, and grabbed something out of her bag.So now, I'm the Head Editor. An old framed photograph.It was sooooooo outraaageously hard to keep all the bulging little things not being let out while receiving good news, and it felt like my head turned into voice recording mode. I could hear, and memorize, every single word my boss said. And I just couldn't keep all the imaginably aggressive blue butterflies from churning my stomach. She thought for a while and found a perfect spot to put the frame, and with slight measurements she left the frame in place, satisfied with the way she put it on her desk.All I could think of was all the possible delicious menus I would cook for tonight's dinner, to end today with a little celebration. A picture of her, and Lee Taemin. Her childhood, teenage years, adulthood, life time best friend that she had never been separated from. Her playmate, her schoolmate, her impingement, her bus mate, her neighbor. Someone she always turned to every time she's happy, excited, sad, tired, wonderstruck...A dinner for two. ...and heartbroken.Still a lot more than that, now I have a secretary. A super nice one! You'll have to meet her! Han Ji smiled at the picture, and then zipped her bag. Tomorrow would be a big day, her first day working in a new position, in a new room. So she decided to grab her keys and locked her room, and then rushed to her car to enjoy the rest of the afternoon at home.Aaand that's all for today! Or not.Loves, Han Ji ***"You totally nailed it! I m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">hate you!"Han Ji laughed, her hands holding the set of three cards that she had just won. Geeks they were, and SET was the game. Taemin took another six cards from the deck and spread them on the table.Han Ji decided to drive off to Taemin's house to enjoy the rest of the afternoon, since both of them had a short day. Hot chocolate, a few bars of muesli and Taemin's exceptionally huge number of board games were just beyond perfect."Ah, Taemin!"Taemin got startled, and glared at Han Ji hopelessly. "Oh come on, shut it, you. I almost had a perfect 'Set' in my mind and now it's all ruined.""You're so cute when you're annoyed," she chuckled. Unpredictably blushing, Taemin rolled his eyes and shrugged his shoulders. "I brought you something,""Really??" he suppressed his word in reply, sounding excited. "Well, then, give it to me."Han Ji pouted. "Really, mushroom head..? 'Give it to me'..?""Hey, I've got a new haircut!""Whatever, you and mushroom are destined to be together forever." She grabbed her bag and started looking for the thing she'd gotten for her best friend. "Gosh, that little thing is thirsty for hide and seek.""m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">Little? So you got me something m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">little?" Taemin pouted back and rested his chin on his palm."Zip it, will you." Han Ji took all her stuff out of her bag, one by one, hoping that what she was looking for was not left anywhere outside the house. Taking out the last thing, she finally spotted something shiny tucked in the very bottom of her bag. "There it is!""What is it? What is it?""It's a..." Han Ji made a dramatic slow-mo with her hand, taking the thing out of her bag, and Taemin drumrolled with his voice. "...a FOOD COUPON!!""A FOOD--" Taemin's drum rolls suddenly turned into a sad symphony of ballad, and he frowned. "Did you just say a food coupon?"Han Ji laughed. "No! You see here, it's a reservation at Kifino, and you know how fancy that restaurant is! I didn't get this for free, and there's some good news I want to tell you, so you better be happy about this. We're having a sophisticated dinner tomorrow night, just us two! Come on, say something!"Taemin thought for a while, and then his eyes widened. "Tomorrow night?""Yeah!"He buzzed. "How if--"A loud, ringing sound cut his sentence, and both Taemin and Han Ji's head turned to where the sound might have come from. Han Ji reached for her phone and there it was, telling her to pick her phone up."It's a ring tone I set specifically for my mom," Han Ji muttered. "Hello?"Taemin ruffled his hair. "At least you could've set it on a lower volume...""What? Tonight? Eh? Now? Alright! Alright! I'm coming!" Han Ji ended the call and looked at Taemin, her face full of excitement. "Mom's prepared a big thing for tonight's dinner!""So you're going home?""Yeah! I wouldn't wanna hear anything anymore from you, come tomorrow, okay? 7 PM, Kifino. Just come there and show the envelope!" Han Ji stuffed her delicates into her bag, zipping it and rushed towards Taemin's door. "See you!"Taemin waved his hand with a big smile, and then his eyeballs moved to look at the envelope. The color was maroon and it was covered in plastic, Han Ji's name was written in golden letters on the bottom left of the envelope. And then his eyeballs moved up, looking at the clock, the hands struck 5 o'clock. From the clock he moved his sight to the window, and there he could see Han Ji walking away from his house.Han Ji.Lee Han Ji.No, no, no. It's Shim Han Ji. It's m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">still Shim Han Ji.Taemin put the envelope on his desk and flung his body into the bed again, ruffling his hair. m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">When can I ever tell her the truth? He stared helplessly at the ceiling. m style="color:inherit;line-height:1.625;">Seventeen years of being friends, from elementary school till we both have a job, and not letting her know how I feel?He rubbed his face. "Come on, Taemin. You can do it."Then came the horrible possible consequences that could happen if he ever did tell her the truth, and he felt something really heavy weighing in his chest. His friendship with her was one of the best things God had ever given to his life, but it was also so much of an obstacle for him, something that could turn very fragile if she knew the feelings he'd had for her since forever.He got up, realizing something not right was lying under his body. Moving his blanket away from the bed, he discovered something he believed he had seen, something that shouldn't be there. Something that he shouldn't even be looking at.A book.A bright blue notebook.It was Han Ji's, definitely Han Ji's. She must have accidentally left it, since it was one thing he must never touch other than her other female-related stuff. A notebook she had kept since high school, that she always labeled as private, and that she stated she would never forgive him if he ever touched it. But now he was holding it, opening the cover, flipping pages after pages, reading words after words. It was definitely Han Ji's handwriting, and with occasional gulps, Taemin spent the rest of the day reading whatever had been written in the book.***Dear Love, wherever you are. It was probably one of the worst days Han Ji had ever gone through. One of the worst days that she had never made plans for, one day that she would never want to have to anticipate. One day she would never want to have.I graduated from high school today. She had looked around in her room, opening every closed space, emptying every stuffed shelf, and the thing, the precious thing she had been looking for was nowhere to be found.Are you graduating, too? Or have you already graduated, and now making your way through college? Han Ji massaged her nose, sweating. There's no way she would ask mom to help her find it. Mom would be the last person to know that she had that one thing, one thing that helped her through all joyful and difficult times, one thing that now was nowhere in sight.Or... could you still be a highschooler, and graduating years after I did? She has managed to search in the warehouse, and everywhere else possible. Dad's workroom, the kitchen where she helped her mom prepare dinner last night, the dining room, bookshelves, DVD shelves, and even in the garage. Where else could it be?Whatever level you're now at, I just want you to know that I am so happy... I survived high school. Her office?I wouldn't have survived it with this much strength if I didn't have you, though. Gulping, Han Ji looked at the clock. Dinner with Taemin would be at 7 PM, and now it's already 6. If she drove to the office now, that would take her twenty minutes, and the searching game could last for around thirty minutes. Then it would take twenty minutes to reach home and get ready, and at the time she reached the restaurant, she would be so late. And she knew how much she hated about being late.Having you to talk to is just... something I would never regret the rest of my life. Something I would always be proud of having started. And I would definitely love to have all these conversations finally brought up to life, so we can talk in person, in real life... But it was something she could never lose.Sometimes I think, would I actually show all these to you, once we have met? Han Ji grabbed her keys and started the car engine, and with full speed, she drove off to her office.Or would I just keep it to myself, and one day find it all dusted in the cabinet, reading through all these pages, and laughed at all the happy and sad things I've been through with this book? It was 6:25, and the office was already pretty quiet. Han Ji rushed to her room, her new room, fifth level. But the only thing that she could find in the room was her cabinet, her chair and her desk, with only a few things on it. A calendar, a box of stationery, a lamp...Sometimes I think, if I would ever show this book to my kids... ...and a photograph of her and Taemin. She looked up to the clock and saw that it was 6:35. Rushingly, she opened all drawers in the desk, only to find them being empty. Realizing she would definitely be late, Han Ji decided to just drive to the restaurant without getting ready. Yeah, with jeans and t-shirt.Would my teenage daughter take my advice, and survive high school the way I did? "Phone... phone..." Han Ji groped her pockets, attempting to call Taemin. There was nothing in all her four jeans pockets, so she quickly got out of the building and opened the doors of her car, turning all the lamps on, looking for her phone. And the precious thing, too, if she was fortunate enough to find it in the car.I never told my mom about this book, though, so I don't know if my future daughter will ever want to talk about this kinda stuff with me, too... They were nowhere to be found.But I guess, if my daughter ever hid something like this from me, I would so let her. Feeling like crying, Han Ji saw the clock had struck 6:50. Her office to the restaurant would take approximately thirty minutes, and that didn't include the possible-to-happen traffic jam along the way.Thanks again for listening, Love, I can't wait to meet you. She drove off anyway.***"I don't have my reservation with me, but someone is waiting inside." Han Ji insisted.The waiter looked at her tired face carefully. "Can I have the name of the person who made the reservation, please, Madam?""Shim Han Ji." She replied, still panting. "It's under the name of Shim Han Ji.""Wait a second," the waiter scrolled down the page. "Shim Han Ji. Someone checked in for this reservation around an hour ago, but I am afraid he or she might have left,""It was a guy around this much tall," Han Ji raised one of her hands, showing how tall Taemin was. "Did you see him leave the place?""I am very sorry, Madam, but the exit is at the other end of the restaurant," the waiter looked at Han Ji with empathy. "If you would please, we have unreserved tables nearby the fountains. We have a special menu tonight."Han Ji let out a deep sigh and shook her head, smiling. "No, thank you. Thanks for the info,"She got out of the restaurant, walking through the street, not caring if her car was still parked in front of the restaurant. She just felt like crying. She never thought losing that thing would hurt her so much, and being late for the dinner for an hour just made everything worse."Shim Han Ji."Han Ji surprisedly looked around, finding the source of the voice that called her name.Dear Love, wherever you are. "You can hate me after this, or act like we have never met..."She looked back, only to find the only possible source of the very familiar voice.Nothing special happened today. I just felt like talking to you. "...but just for this time, please listen to what I want to say."There was Taemin, in a hoodie and jeans, walking towards her under the street lights. The way he talked and looked at her was so different tonight, making her gulp and somehow nervous.Have you ever thought, if maybe we have ever met before? Taemin stopped right in front of her, his hands were tucked into his hoodie pocket."Do you remember the first time we met?" Han Ji could see a thin smile upon his face. "You were trying to lock your lockers. The bell had rung and you just couldn't fit everything in, and me, who was a total stranger to you, was asked for help,"Could we have passed by each other on a street, or are you someone I know? "You were wearing a California sweatshirt, and you tied your hair up that day."I'm sorry. It's raining, so... all kinds of cliche thoughts just kind of came across my mind. Han Ji looked at him, at his eyes that never looked at her this way before, the eyes that didn't look away. She never even remembered, or tried to remember the first time they met, and after the words Taemin had said, everything just became clear in her head, as if it had always been there the whole time but she just could never get it out."Even at the age of eight, I knew I was looking at the most beautiful eyes in the world."Han Ji's heart started beating faster. That's what she felt, at least. She stood still, not moving an inch, sweat was all over her body.But, really. Have you ever thought why God hasn't made us united, yet? "And I know I always am. Every time I look at them, they remind me of the reason why I always choose to stay."What does He want us to prepare? She took a deep breath, and her eyes felt really, really heavy.He let out a deep sigh, the smile put upon his face was a smile he only showed during times Han Ji couldn't even classify. "I have never seen anything so perfect ever since."Could it be that you're a bad guy, and God is not making us meet before you become a good guy? "Each and every day we're together, since elementary school, to middle school, high school, until now when we've built our own paths, every day just makes me realize even more how much I can never let you go."If so, then please be a good guy. "I know I usually hate to say this, but I have to admit that it is true... And how much your eyes, and your smile, and your laugh, and the things we spend together mean to me."My mom doesn't like bad guys. "You can hate me after this, but I would never forgive myself if I never told you."And if you're a good guy, please don't be a bad guy until we meet. Taemin raised his hand, showing something Han Ji thought she would never see again. That blue notebook was held in his hand, and she automatically moved forward."Where did you--""--you left it yesterday," he smiled, and handed the notebook over. She wanted to say something, but something strange, something strong and unexplainable was there in her chest, holding back all the words.Because once we're together, I'll never let you be a bad guy. "The book was there the whole time," he said, "and so is your Love,"For the first time Han Ji realized she was looking at the most sincere, truthful eyes in the world. For the first time she felt as if a missing piece of her puzzle had been discovered, as if something long lost had just been found.No, not just the book.But whoever you are, I will love you with all I've got. For the first time, she found true love."So it's you," she muttered, her face was now a few inches away from her best friend's chest. He, who used to be shorter than her, had now grown so tall. "Is it?"That's what my mom always tells me... to love someone with all your heart. To never let them down. To always believe, that no matter what, it's love that always brings you back up. "So, Shim Han Ji," he said to her, half whispering, "If you said mushroom and I were meant to be together forever..."Taemin's fingers ran through Han Ji's arm, reaching for her fingers and held them tight. His left hand reached something from his pocket, and without looking away from Han Ji's eyes, he inserted Han Ji's fingers into something, that she would never doubt, was a ring.And the day we finally meet, "...would you be my mushroom?"there would be no other day where I would ever be more thankful. (June 10th, 11:10 PM)