[M] The Three Principles (1/1)

Die is an easy word, isn't it?

I can just yell it off to my friends as a joke."Die son of a bitch die!" said with an evil chuckle.Or if I despise that person"Rot and die somewhere I can't see you."It's effortless to slip by my lips, don't you think?

But, it's quite irrational and unthinkable to kill someone —

especially how am I going to kill someoneby my filthy hands.but wait.. I don't have friends[Lee Donghae - 11/29/05] 1 YEAR AGO Donghae's chest heaved, his breathing being drawn-out as his vision became foggy like nimbus clouds start to hover in the skies. Half-lidded, his eyes roamed aimlessly between those blanket of air, desperately seeking for help or even just pity to release drops of fluids to cleanse his worn out body; and yes, they did answer. He expected the heavens to be soft but no, its gift for him was nothing like the soft touches of water — the acid pricking his face and it hurt even more as it seeped through his open wound directed on where the bullet pierced in as the metal still sending cold shivers throughout his body.He was lying on the ground, pooled with his own blood and now diluted in the rain, flowing through the cracks of the cold, old cement. Donghae doesn't have any idea what just happened and why the hell was he doing in this alley; the only thing he knows is that he's about to die, he's still conscious and he's now in need of water. Donghae laughed to himself, with his voice bouncing on the narrow walls.'Is this how I'm going to die?' he asked himself, looking for some self pity inside him but he could only laugh at the situation he's in.It was absurd; instead of crying for help or someone to call an ambulance, Donghae did not, he persist his half-lifeless hand to reach over the scarcely empty strawberry cartoon milk that he drank earlier, now dissipated with the scattered groceries he bought with the money he earned. As much as he struggled, the more he felt nothing but the cold bullet that sank in his flesh and all the sound his mouth could produce was small whimpers and sobs.Then a man came, his hair dyed in red, brighter than Donghae's own blood, his teeth glisterd as he grinned, walking slow as ever through the dark alley with a transparent umbrella on hand. Donghae felt his heart thump faster, the color of red spreading again throughout the puddle of water. He kneeled down beside Donghae, took the drink and popped the straw in Donghae's mouth, then lightly squeezed it so the dying man could take his last sip.Donghae stared back and the man stood up, having the blood covered bullet within his fingers. He flashed a gawky smile at Donghae but then, the dying man blacked out.-With his nails dug onto the mattress, Donghae's eyes quickly fluttered open, tried his hardest to catch his strangled breath, choking up every once in a while. Donghae slowly pulled himself to sit up straight, scrunched his noise as the stench of plastic and soaked metal rose in the air. Leaning on the headrest, the newly painted walls caught his attention so did the plastic covered furnitures. Nervously, Donghae swiped the blanket of cold sweat beaded on his forehead.It's only a dream — a fucking nightmare. Donghae soothed himself, running his fingers through his hair before hugging his legs and burying his face on his knees."You're wrong." A voice came from his right. "You're completely wrong."Donghae did not know what was wrong with him but his hands just clutched on his pyjamas, convincing himself that what he just heard was nothing but a pigment of his imagination. He was just hallucinating, and it’s only a delusional thing. But, he was actually teriffied that his heart was pumping so fast that it could jump out from his chest because of the questions circulating in his head. Should he look back? Should he hide under the covers?He was just confused, completely demented.His gut was nagging him so much that it was evident from all the lip biting and tongue clicking he was doing for the past minutes. A cold wind blew past the open window panes and one vase was knocked off, broke into pieces and the erratic sound resonated throughout the room. He had no choice but to look back as silence was all he could hear in the room and it made his insides twist in the most undesirable way.What bothered Donghae... there was no broken vase... just a man swinging his legs on the window ledge, smirking as his gaze made Donghae dumbfounded with his actions and he repeated. "You. Are. Wrong." Donghae felt his chest tightened, his legs shivering and the man's smirk left him in a frightened gape.He was the same man from Donghae's 'dream' the one who did something not particularly nice or bad, he just helped him take one more intake of the strawberry milk."Then tell me what happened." Donghae demanded and also, he congratulated himself for not stuttering but, it was not enough for the uneasiness leave his chest. He was somehow afraid of what the man would say, what would he react, how will he deal with Donghae's question. All of it made his head spin. At the back of Donghae's mind, there was this thought of escape, the thought of evading this man. But, if what this man was saying is true? Donghae needs to listen to it — he needs to cut the shit out, thinking that he's dead… or going to be."Let's just say..." There was a long pause behind it, with the man sucking the hollow of his cheek, nibbling it before eyeing Donghae, who was mentally ripping off the sheets because of the uneasiness smothering all over him."..I saved you."With one gesture of the man's hand, like magic and absolutely psychic, Donghae was off from his bed, standing on nothing but air then was pulled in front of the man's face, his feet still not meeting the ground. Donghae panicked as the man's gaze peering through his very eyes, even if how many times he ordered him to put him down, the man would only give a smirk and lift him higher."I said bring me down! This is my house in the first place. My house. My rules now get me down!""Who the hell are you?!"Irritated, the man snapped his fingers which made Donghae crash his back on the ceiling, releasing a small yelp and a cough of annoyance as the man just rubbed his temples. "Shut up for like 2 fucking minutes, will ya?" Donghae nodded vigorously and the man put him down, but not gently .. he fell down 7 feet high from the floor, ass flat. Thankfully, he did not complain and stood up after that, crossed his arms then stared back at the man, who was completely staring back at him also and it gone on for minutes.The blood rushed faster through Donghae's vessels as the man was about to broke the silence. It felt like a damned millennia just by opening his mouth and Donghae wanted to beat the crap out of his mind for slowing everything down. But now, it didn't matter and as the man's eyes slowly fluttered open, Donghae swore he could just have a heart attack right at that moment of the man was about to speak. Thanking the heavens, Donghae managed to gulp everything away temporarily."I am the God of the Underworld. You can call me Eunhyuk or whatever name you want." Donghae lightly scoffed. "You're supposed to be dead believe it or not.""And for your information, this is my house." His eyes widen in shock, as the blurred memories seemed to popped up in his head from nowhere.How his whole family was killed..And he wasn't there for them..Donghae staggered back from where he was standing, tripped on his feet then landed on the carpet. His fingers knotted and yanked through his hair, light sobs escaped from his mouth, remembering his family members being taken away and sent in the ambulance, still covered with blood.His ragged breathing .. it became harsher .. as the past was coping up to him.Donghae was on his knees, pleading to heavens that it was not true, they were not true and none of them ever happened. But no, they did. Slowly he looked up, his mind clouded with sorrow, his eyes cheeks soaked with those tears, the wounds on his knuckles reappeared. Eunhyuk understood and knelt down beside him, taking Donghae to his arms, cradled him as if he was his brother."I'm not very easy to be pleased." Eunhyuk pulled Donghae and pressed his cold lips on the other's forehead. "Entertain me and I shall give you what you want.""No." Donghae muttered and Eunhyuk slightly loosened his grip. "Why should I entertain you when you're just acting like you know what I want!"He pushed Eunhyuk with enough force so his back crashed on the wall. His eyes remained wide, filled with hatred, his nails scrabbled on the carpet, slowly he crawled back. “I didn’t mean to .. sorry .. I’m.”Donghae coughed then sobbed, cupping his face before leaning on the edge of the mattress.Eunhyuk rubbed his right shoulder then in one snap; Donghae was sitting in upright position. He edged in towards Donghae, ogling him with those pitch black eyes which made Donghae panic. But, as much as Donghae wanted to tear his stare away from him, there was this some kind of force that magnet his attention to the other’s gaze.“I like those eyes of yours.” Then he just knew, Eunhyuk’s finger was below his chin, lifting his face up so he could see them properly. It creep him out actually, the way Eunhyuk observed him, with those head turnings and teasing sniffs, all of it made him froze and shiver.“They’re full of..”“Hatred.”A blissful chuckle resonated from Eunhyuk’s lips which made Donghae quiver in fear, not even noticing that Eunhyuk straddled him and the other’s ass was on his lap while a finger was running up and down his torso.“All you need is to entertain me to get some of my lessons and your will to kill.” Donghae shuddered and gripped onto his own pants while Eunhyuk leaned in, closed the gap between them until their lips were barely touching and Donghae released another stifled exhale.“Then you’re ready to get your revenge.”Donghae suddenly felt suffocated, like another spirit took his body as its vessel right at that moment. His blood ran hot in his veins, circulating faster throughout his system. Unconsciously, he took Eunhyuk’s hand and placed it on his chest where his heart is supposed to be, and then ever so slowly, he closed his eyes soak in tears.Actually, both of them were taken aback by surprise, Donghae locked their lips together, both of his hands descending towards Eunhyuk’s waist, gripped them with his fingers looped onto the fabric, pulling the so called god closer until their chest met. Eunhyuk opened a sliver of space between his lips which the other’s instinct told him to push his down through the other’s mouth.Eunhyuk did not fight; he supported himself by temporarily fixing his hands on the floor as the other was shoving the wet muscle to explore throughout it, recognizing the test of mint with a hint of metal. To be honest, Donghae’s inner self liked it.He was so sucked in that his mind was darkened by Eunhyuk’s words, not knowing if he agreed to them or not. He doesn’t even know if what he’s doing for the god was entertainment, if pleasure was even under entertainment. He was utterly confused what to do next, what is actually going on with his own mind and he’s insisting of asking himself what the hell is happening in Eunhyuk’s head.When Donghae’s eyes flickered open, it was immediately drawn to the God’s before pulling away with a fragile strand, he was panting already while Eunhyuk kept a steady pace. His brows furrowed as he noticed that Eunhyuk’s eyes were vacant … void .. there was no specific color .. it wasn’t even considered black.It scared the shit of him, his teeth chattered…But before Donghae can do anything else, he was taken by the nape; the god crashed their lips forcibly. Even with his struggles and kicks, Eunhyuk won’t budge. He was held steadily, arms pinned over the mattress. Then Donghae knew to himself, he couldn’t do anything.So he welcomed his doom with open arms.-“Honestly Donghae-“ He watched Donghae pour another bottle of soju right on his pants. It continued until he sighed and took Donghae’s wrist, guiding it towards the glass. “—you’re really. I don't know.""Interesting." Donghae's hysterical laugh was so contagious that he found himself laughing at the sober man, thinking about how fascinating Donghae was, talking about his intentions in his own 'sober' way. Eunhyuk was never mistaken about him..He found himself a nice story book.He was attracted to Donghae's manner of explaining things, the way he's hiccupping his way through his own words and how he's dipping his head down on the table, picking himself up after a mili-second bumping on the wood then shrugging it off and continue his blabbers.And surprised with himself, he was also laughing. PRESENT "Rule 1 : Don't let your hatred manipulate you. Use it as a tool and always ask yourself what's your real purpose.""Please don't kill me please!" The man pleaded in a whisper like growl."If you have so much pity for yourself-" He lifted the man's chin and scanned the man's face, for a murderer he was quite good looking; a sharp nose, long lashes, he had these red highlights that brought out the fairness of skin but now it's covered with different shades of black, blue and purple.The man was staring as if he was throwing daggers but it was not enough for his towering glares shooting from the windows, tearing the man's soul out and left the vessel nothing but fear and more reflections of begs.His chest tightened, his toes curled, he lifted a fist up, his nails sinking on his palms as his clicked his eyelids shut. He was lowering his arm and the man made a tensed grin on his lips,thinking he doesn't have the courage to beat the fuck out of him. That this guy was nothing but a coward who tries to act tough just because he had him trapped.But he was mistaken.Knuckles landed on his left cheek which threw him stumbling on the floor. The man hissed from the sting landed on his flesh and a bruise appeared immediately. His eyes were shaded from so much anger, so much hatred; he was gritting his teeth as he stomped his foot on the wounded face then ground it down on the floor."—then think about what you did to my family." 1 YEAR AGO Donghae choked in his sleep, finding Eunhyuk draped all over him, their legs entagled, his head laid on Eunhyuk's chest as he was pulled again.. hard. Unfortunately, they did it again last night with him getting drunk and easily conducted to do things that he did not actually want to do.Well finally, he acknowledged his weakness.. he's easily persuaded by Eunhyuk."You're awake?" Donghae heard him whisper, unconsciously buried his head even more on the other's chest."Y-Yes.. somehow.. my head still hurts.""Looks like it. You were moaning everytime you move in your sleep."Donghae felt a feverish rush brush on his cheeks, making him bit his lip and bury himself even more, especially the thought that Eunhyuk watched him all night but he still did not get why was he acting like a girl getting shy after .. you know."Okay, let me get you a milkshake to get rid of your hang-over."Donghae was stuck in a daze, his eyes lightly squinted as Eunhyuk's back faced him. He admired how well built Eunhyuk's body was while his was just slender, no actual muscles toned, just flat and everything. Not only that, even watching him sleeping for several nights, his face was still fresh, not a single trace of stress and he doesn't have any dark circles under his eyes unlike Donghae."Rest for a bit." With those words, Eunhyuk ruffled his already disheveled hair and smiled before disappearing from his sight. Another smile managed to tug his lips but faded eventually.Donghae rolled over and laid an arm over his forehead. He was still confused how the hell he was still alive but even he insisted Eunhyuk with the answer, the god would only run his thoughts in circles that it annnoyed the shit out of him or even worse, Eunhyuk would pull out another soju from the fridge to escape the question.Everything was just so surreal, from the point he thought he died and finally with his family up to the moment he's in a god's .. let's just say a stranger's apartment and getting drunk and fucked almost everyday for the exchange of some knowledge that he wanted or he thought he needed. Honestly, there was nothing to complain; revenge plus mind blowing sex? It's a win-win situation except for being sore and hell so wasted because most of the time, it's a blur.He groaned, again rolling to the extent his upper half was dangling on the edge of the bed as he slowly tried to bring his aching legs on the floor. He managed to get one right on the slipper and stings of pain immediately came raging on his lower back. Urging to go on, his chest tightened as another leg dropped down on the carpet, gasping as he tried to stand up but stumbled straight on the wall, hips dashing against the lamp which almost crashed on the floor but Donghae managed to get a hold of it and returned it back on the nightstand.Letting out another sigh, his hands scrabbled on the wall, slowly guiding himself to the next corner, to take a peek if Eunhyuk was already done so he could ask him another batch of questions. His head still throbbed as the new knowledge Eunhyuk ingested while he was unconsious was becoming visible in his thoughts, like Eunhyuk imprinted them in his brain. His blood boiled and he felt rather hot and dizzy. Donghae finally reached the corner but his body gave up on him; his legs wobbled and he almost fell right on the floor."I said rest Donghae." Donghae felt his heart broke.He looked up, finding a worried expression plastered on his face. "I thought you said that you're going to do it today but what are you doing?""Going to do what?""What you said last night while you're sober." With that, Eunhyuk just fell silent and laid Donghae on the bed.Donghae doesn't have any idea what the god was saying. He tried to complain but no words came out from his mouth as Eunhyuk lightly pressed his lips on the other's forehead. "I'll get your milkshake, okay?" then he disappeared from his sight.Donghae had his mouth hanging open.For a god of the underworld, Eunhyuk was rather sweet and caring. PRESENT "Rule 2 : Do not let your conscience get the best out of you. Keep your intentions clear and never go back on your word."He approached the lightswitch, his fingers shaking like crazy as he finally touched the wall. Slwoly exhaling, something crept up at the back of his mind.. something dark.. something vivid.. and it's making him anxious because he knew he's watching him, he's anticipating his every move. Most importantly, he is perfectly entertained by how he is acting like now, how he's nearly going to have a heart attack in minutes, how he's clutching on his pants, how clouded his eyes were.He made him want to vomit on the floor even if he was only standing on the sidelines and was not interfering with anything except for his already shuffled thoughts."Do it." Many strange voices whispering, yelling and merely muttering the same thing in his head and he could not keep them under control. He yelled and punched the wall then approached him and landed a fit on his stomach, releasing an 'oof' before crashing on the crates. After that, he did not move, even just a twitch.His whole body fell numb, and he could also tell that the man was staring at him in fear. "Have you recalled your actions?" The man did not answer.His temper, his anger, his frustration, everything was eating him alive. He was so sick of everyone around him, especially him. Ever stomp of his echoed through the man's eardrums, the man's eyes widen as he was pulled by the hair and those eyes were looking at him again. "Seems like a no." He sneered in disgrace then stuffed a handkerchief on the other's mouth. The man was again begging for him but no, it was not enough... because for him, his punishment is only a sheer for what he suffered for losing his family, his only companion, the only ones that could understand him.. the man took them all away.He stood up and with no hesitation, he finally clicked the switch on.  It's been a long time since I've written to you.

I'm sorry.Someone is now helping me

And I don't feel that lonely anymore.He's handsome, caring and shit I don't want to describe him much further.He was right. He saved me.I wrote this in the bathroom and I don't think I'll have the chance to write again.

I don't want him to read this.[Lee Donghae - 1/02/06] 1 WEEK AGO Donghae had his attention on his lap, playing with his very fingers. The snow lightly dappled on the road and temporarily stained on the windshield and every part of the car. "You okay?" asked Eunhyuk and took his hand as they were now stuck in a Saturday morning traffic."Definitely.." not.It's been months since he last faced his family and it made his stomach churn from what he should tell them and how should he start their conversation. He was afraid that he's not going to be forgiven and that his parents would officially disowned him which sounded so crazy because they're dead but, he has Eunhyuk with him and he hopes he could talk through him or he's becoming plain retarded."Are you really fine?" This time, Donghae did not answer anything but a small shook of the head and even with that, the god easily understood. The warm feeling of butterflies circulated in Donghae's stomach as he was pulled by Eunhyuk to a mind baffling kiss.Through the frigid day, Eunhyuk's breath was colder as it swiped on Donghae's face. There was no hesitation, there was nothing to be a wit about. He throttled forward, first letting the other drape his tongue on his chapped lips to moistened it which he thought it was kind of hot then he let out a breathy moan. Donghae could smell him, a smell of cherries dipped in blood and he found it surprising since he only noticed those at this moment.Donghae gasped when the god's cold fingertips traced his jaw and Eunhyuk took the chance. With the god's tongue slipping between his lips, Donghae whimpered, his fingers tangled on the other's trench coat, his face contorting as the uneasiness was pooling again on his stomach. His unsteady breathing made Eunhyuk suck more on the other's soft muscle, sliding his own tongue further in Donghae's mouth.Eunhyuk was fascinated by his reactions when he half lidded looking at Donghae, whose face was filled but nothing with pleasure, ears and cheeks tainted in bright pink. What amused him was Donghae's small shivers especially when he was playing with the other's tongue, he would moan and tighten his grip on Eunhyuk's coat then Eunhyuk could feel the other's grip shudder on the cloth; he could not help but awkwardly smile.Beep. Beep. Beep.They parted with Donghae softly groaning at the loss. For a second, they look at each other, Eunhyuk noticed the fire blazing on Donghae's eyes, those bright swirls and how they twinkled back at him, Donghae's brunette hair, slightly damp, Donghae's cheeks, patched with a rosy pink color.Beep. Beep.Eunhyuk chuckled and placed his forehead a second on the steering wheel. "Dammit." whispered Eunhyuk before drifing the clutch and drove forward.The momentary silence risen again. Donghae's head was laid on the car door, his brown locks covering most part of his face. Eunhyuk confused him, he made his heart dance all fluttery and shit in his chest and it made him want to puke with all the uncertainty driving him insane. He kept his finger tips on his lips, the touch of Eunhyuk's own cold soft plump lips still lingering in his thoughts.On the other hand, Eunhyuk was a worry wart, looking back and forth from the driveway and Donghae. He wondered if he done something wrong to his very unpredictable man on the passenger seat.As the car stopped again, this time on a hazard, Eunhyuk kissed Donghae's hair, trying to comfort the man before him.-The skies were cleared, a little speck of light showing itself between the dark clouds. It was already dusk when they arrived on where his family was buried. Donghae was awakened in annoyance when the car tires was rolling on the gravel path since there was no stable road here. His fingers curled on the ledge, peering through the window, but he didn't see anything but moist and more moist on the glass."Hey. Wake up." Donghae did not respond, he just remained from his position, a finger sliding on the window until it stopped on the lock.Eunhyuk snapped, he was so frustrated of him being ignored all throughout the trip. Of course, it was so obvious that Donghae wasn't actually sleeping because of his breathing patterns and numerous movements. Honestly, he was not tired by driving, it was the long traffic wore him out.In a click of his tongue, half of Donghae's body was lifted from the car door but he still remained in that awkward position. "It's gettin dark, we got to hurry." informed Eunhyuk who was already shutting the door. It took Donghae a heavy sigh and a few minute stare on his lap before removing his ass on the passenger seat and got out of the car the same manner Eunhyuk did , except he accidentally added the situation which he lost his balance and fell on the ground."Get up. Here." offered Eunhyuk, thrusting out his hand from the confinements of his pockets. Donghae looked up a second before grabbing the god's hand and pulled himself up. "We better hurry."-They climbed the hill with Donghae falling on the soil and he's now cursing his footwear choice for this occasion. Of course, Eunhyuk would help him up then smile or sometimes laugh at the awkward positions in Donghae's landing but the other would just shrug it off and take the god's hand.Donghae observed the place; it didn't change much except there were no flowers and the soil was mostly covered with snow with grass poking up in some places and the trees were barren though it grew taller than Donghae last remember or maybe it's just the darkness making it seem tall. He shook his head and focused on the trail before slipping for the nth time."I think this is it." said Donghae, his gloved hand cupping away the snow from the tombstone and finally clearing his family members' names. He sighed and knelt in front of them, held a bouquet of flowers which he snatched away from Eunhyuk's left hand and laid it on top of the mound.After the prayer, he took out their most recent family picture from his coat, kissed it and placed it beside the flowers then stood up. Donghae watched as their exhales created small clouds of white that dissolved within seconds it left their mouths. Donghae stared aimlessly, mostly had his attention on their family picture.Eunhyuk broke Donghae's endess trance, his hand slithered on the other's waist and brought him to his side then that hand dropped. "Do you have something to say for them?""M-Me?" Donghae pointed at himself.Eunhyuk rolled his eyes, "Yeah you."Donghae wriggled his arms and legs before letting out a breathy sigh then he licked his dry lips."Umma .. Aboji .. Henli, you are going to get your justice. I love you guys... always. Plus, you're in safe hands now." Donghae could not help himself but sob. He rubbed his eyes and continued further."Umma, Aboji.. Henli .. this is Eunhyuk .. I-" PRESENT "Rule 3 : Remove the word 'Guilt' from your dictionary because there's no turning back."High voltages ran through the man's bruised body and he violently shook, his chair wriggling across the room.He enjoyed it watching the man's nearly lifeless body being controlled by the electricity. More chuckles emitted from his throat until he was hysterically laughing, fist pounding on the wall and an arm clutching around his stomach"You deserve it!" He yelled, his laughs' pitch escalating higher and higher. He was already kneeeling on the floor, his forehead merely inches from the ground.Indeed his actions were so morbid, never did He felt so alive watching them from where he collapsed earlier, the pure ecstasy abstractly painted on his face as he enjoyed the man’s misery being electrified to death.On the other hand, his blood boil in anticipation of how long does this man going to last. It’s been five minutes, the man was still yelling. He yanked his legs off the floor, swaying like a drunk man on the street, he was raking his feet on the cement, drawing himself back on the wall and slid a finger to momentarily stop the man’s punishment.His anger for the man returned again and his hatred for him building up until it was finally eating him alive. His fingers hooked on the gun on his waistband and the man looked at him in terrible fear as if saying ‘no-no-please-don’t, which in fact were the words he said when the saliva soaked cloth was torn away from his mouth.“What. What did you say again?” He mocked and sneered when the man said the word ‘please’.“Do not kill me please!” “Say those words agai—““Please I beg you!”He had enough of the man’s blabber shit. He could not contain himself that he had punched him twice, with his face being sandwiched on the ground .. his once almost flawless face but he damaged it.“I’m sorry! I’m sorry for what I did to your family. Release me please. I won’t tell the police. Please don’t kill me.”Another punchAnd the nextAnd the nextHe never got tired until his knuckles sting and they were already colored by the man's blood."It's too late.." He breathed and slowly stood up."IT'S TOO LATE YOU SON OF A BITCH!" He kicked the man's stomach which made him cough more blood on the cement."378 days too late.""N-No.. please don't!""See you in hell, fucker."A higher percentage of volts shocked the man's body. It didn't take 10 minutes for him to vacate his body and finally leave this world .. the light bulb popping indicated that his life ended...He was temporarily in ease...Nevertheless, He was so entertained. 1 WEEK AGO They didn't spoke to each other on their way home. The skies turned gray but no actual rain was falling and the winds were just stable in silence, like the state they're in. Donghae was freezing, rubbing both of his gloved palms together and exhaling to it every once in a while. On the other hand, Eunhyuk was focused on the driveway, his eyebrows furrowed and his eyes were duller than before.Donghae was worried. He wanted to talk to the god but every since his talk with his family, Eunhyuk just ignored him. He wanted to see him smile again.. even if it was only a fake smile .. just a smile to reassure that he was okay."Eunhyuk..." muttered Donghae but again, there was no answer."Eunhyuk-ah..""Shut up please. Shut up for now. I beg you." Eunhyuk's voice cracked in the end and Donghae's heart nearly broke. He had the urge to hug and comfort him but with the attitude the god was putting up now and the null look he had as his expression, he knew that he doesn't have the chance. So, Donghae just leaned on and softly pecked the other's cheek, hoping that Eunhyuk would grin and kissed him back.He only received a nod.And it annoyed the fuck out of him.-They arrived at Eunhyuk's apartment with him not able to sleep at all thinking about him, him and only him. Donghae was obviously growing distressed from all the cold shoulder the god was giving him. Every time he tried to speak, Eunhyuk would reply to him to 'shut up' and the more the god would say those two words, the more the cut in Donghae's heart got deeper.And he was hoping that Eunhyuk could notice that.He was snapped away from his daze when Eunhyuk opened the door for him, white specks slowly descending on his hair. Then the god thrusted a hand out, and the once soft dark eyes came back again; Donghae couldn't but smile back and took Eunhyuk's hand, curling his fingers in.Everything seemed so perfect except for Eunhyuk not talking.They headed on the elevator and for the first time, Donghae was the one leading the way. It was such a big relief for him after talking to his parents and confessing to them. Heck, he was so damn happy now that he's so close to crushing Eunhyuk's bones by his grip.As soon as the metal doors split, Donghae tugged the god closer, their hands still intertwined when they entered the elevator. There was no one around and Donghae took the advantage of it. He pushed Eunhyuk to the wall, the curve of the god's back fitting on the cold pole.Eunhyuk groaned, Donghae's warm lips latched on his neck, the small wet muscle painting on his skin as if he was a canvas while Donghae's other hand was stroking his torso up and down. Eunhyuk groaned again, when the other's teeth grazed on his collarbone. It surprised him, really.. not that Donghae never dominated it was that ... he already told him that it's--"I love you." whispered Donghae and continued making his desired masterpiece."Umma, Aboji.. Henli .. this is Eunhyuk ..""I love him..""I would like to ask for your blessing."Just as Donghae further bruise his neck, he parted his mouth and sighed then held Donghae off of him by his shoulders, making the brunette look at him to escape the pleasurable trance. "Stop Donghae. I already told you from the start that I can't fall in love with you. First and foremost, I'm a god. I have duties that I will not explain because it's going to take us a week. What I'm doing right now is helping you and feeding my sadist addiction. Second, you' re just going to get hurt.""Understood? Understood. Let's go back."Ding.Eunhyuk got out of the elevator first, his hands pocketed inside his trench coat "Hey Donghae.." cooed Eunhyuk, looking back at Donghae.No answer."I'm sorry Donghae... just please understand. It's for your sake al--""Shut up!" Eunhyuk flinched by those words, electrifying pinches crawled on his back. "It's now my turn to say the words you said earlier to me." He backfired."What on Eart-- Hey Donghae. Just because I'm such a blabber mouth doesn't mean I can't have a few hours of silence every once in a while." argued Eunhyuk, which is a pretty bad idea.Donghae's blood boiled, his ears turning pink, darker than when they're having their make-out session. He took Eunhyuk by the arm, dragged the god away from the hallway to avoid such nuisance and annoying stares from their neighbour, who shook her head, thinking that it was another quarrel-- lovers' quarrel perhaps.“Hey Donghae it hur—““Shut up ‘God of the Underworld’” mocked Donghae. “Can you be quiet?” He hissed and threw Eunhyuk across the couch then crashed beside him after that. Eunhyuk was completely confused for what act Donghae was putting now. He acted bossy and he even concluded that his tantrums are worse than a girl! Eunhyuk rolled his eyes and crossed his arms over his chest, eyeing him once in a while.-With six empty soju bottles on the coffee table, Donghae was flushed drunk, swaying from left to right; his eyes blood shot red, his red tinted ears and cheeks, Eunhyuk found it very alluring and quite cute.He sighed, “If you only knew Hae-ah… if you only knew.” Eunhyuk recoiled, a hand cupped on his mouth. When did he start giving nicknames to his storybooks? News flash. Never.“You are just… different…” It struck late to him that his hand was automatically tucking the several strands of Donghae’s hair behind his ear and that thought made his face feel hot ( to think that his whole body was nothing but definition of cold ). Nonetheless, he’s feeling a warm pit pooling below his stomach and it doesn’t seem so good.Eunhyuk turned, at least to where Donghae would not notice where his chilled fingers were hooking around now, just under his shirt, just grazing on the leather belt, then slowly pushing them down that itchy and irritating cloth and further down.. down.. the garter half  encircling past his wrist. Hand descending lower, head thrashed backward, sight in pitch black as he shut his eyelids tight; he started to fondle his length, slowly at first, starting from the base then tiptoed upward.The sensation of his cold fingers swathing on his throbbing cock was still bearable, Eunhyuk tried hard to just gape as he was tingling for more when he pinched the crown of his cock accompanied by uncontrollable moans seeping between his plump lips. He stroke harder, faster in his pants…Donghae’s voice was all he could hear… no moans… no sound of the rustling of clothes“I love you.”It repeated.“I love you. Why can’t you accept that?”What Eunhyuk didn’t realize, a warm arm was slinking around his waist and another one was already settled on his chest. A heavier moan bubbled away from Eunhyuk’s mouth when a hand joined his cold one stroking him at the very same pace.“What are you doing without me, huh?” asked Donghae, intentionally letting his teeth hit Eunhyuk's earlobe.“None of your business.” Eunhyuk replied and felt his whole insides twist as Donghae squeezed his leaking cock to restrict him from cumming.“Answer me again, God of the Underworld.” commanded Donghae, whose fingers are now yanking on Eunhyuk’s soft red locks, which revealed the exposed skin on Eunhyuk’s neck. He leaned in, sniffed from the god’s nape and taunted his tongue out, slid it on the god’s flesh up to his jaw.Eunhyuk shivered. It was a different version of the drunk Donghae from what he’s used to. This Donghae was aggressive, like he was put on constraints from sex for a long time which was too implausible since they just did it the other day ago. He turned his head and Donghae immediately caught his lips then he released his hand from the cock as Donghae grasped it harder than before.He moaned, it was an embarrassing one so Eunhyuk did not bother to open an eye and let his instincts ran wild. His nails dug on Donghae’s arm which made him release his hand from his cock and finally, Eunhyuk was able to turn around fully. Leaning forward, he cupped both sides of Donghae’s face, crashed their lips further. Donghae’s throat grumbled in delight as the god’s tongue was tracing his lower lip and he wrapped both of his arms around Eunhyuk’s neck, egging on until their chests were pressed; the heat emitting from Donghae’s body melting the god’s thoughts away.Eunhyuk pushed him down, his head now laid on the armrest, with him straddling Donghae. On the other Donghae’s heart was beating fast, as his soaked shirt was meeting with the other’s thin wife beater, the only thing restricting for his heated skin touch the chilled ones. He had the urge of taking them off, both his and Eunhyuk’s shirt.Their kiss continued, not until Eunhyuk, moved away, his lips trailing down on Donghae’s neck, nipping and licking one spot near his collarbone while marvelling his shivering thighs which made Donghae shut his eyes tight, the wild sensation raising him to cloud nine. “E-Eunhyuk…” He breathed out.“Eunhyuk-ah…” continued Donghae, his fingers desperately tangled on Eunhyuk’s red locks.“Eunhyuk… ““I love you.”Eunhyuk stopped momentarily, shot his eyes open and narrowed his attention on the small hickey he made on his neck. He rose from away from the panting Donghae still keeping his stare on the brunette’s flushed face, features contorted beyond description. Donghae’s eyes fluttered open, finding the other’s in a dark … void … and it scared the shit out of him. Eunhyuk pulled his belt out of his pants, catching him off guard, grabbed Donghae’s wrists and wrapped the belt around it.To be honest, Donghae was terrified at the act Eunhyuk was putting up right now. You know what’s worse than an angry expression? It is when they give you a lifeless one.He placed three fingers in front of Eunhyuk’s lips and Donghae completely understood. Taking those fingers in his mouth, Eunhyuk, bit his lip, never failing to keep his stare away from Donghae’s face. Groaning once more, the brunette slid his tongue between the narrow gaps, swirled his talented tongue which made Eunhyuk took a sharp intake of breath and pulled his fingers away without warning then smashed their lips together, their teeth clashing as Eunhyuk pushed himself and nibbled Donghae’s lower lip until it bled.Donghae’s low pants, so was the smell of alcohol enticed him as he was this close to him; their sweat covered foreheads pressed together. Eunhyuk grimaced and pulled himself up then without noting Donghae, he placed one finger inside Donghae’s hole, which made him claw tightly on his back.Completely trounced, Donghae swung an arm around his neck and the other was hook on his back. He buried his head on the crook of the god’s neck to reassure that he was completely fine but his jagged breath indicating that he’s not. Eunhyuk didn’t think twice and pushed the rest of the lubricated fingers in his hole which made Donghae screamed helplessly and raked his fingers on Eunhyuk’s back. It persisted to the moment Donghae’s voice was enough for Eunhyuk to shed tears and the pace of his fingers slowed down. Dumbfounded, Donghae had his mouth hanging open, half-lidded remained on Eunhyuk as he had his hands on a box and another that seemed like a—“I’ll prove to you that you can’t love me.”Donghae’s mind was tattered by his words and actions.. every fiber of him extinguish after a long time burning for him.. his inner self mourning. He was shaking his head, pleading Eunhyuk not to.“Shh.. Shh.. don’t cry,” hushed Eunhyuk, tucked strands of Donghae’s hair behind his ear and kissed his forehead.“You must be thankful because you don’t have to endure a life with someone like me.” Eunhyuk chuckled darkly after that and set the vibrator on high.“Goodnight Hae.” Giggled Eunhyuk and pushed the vibrator inside Donghae’s hole.Even with Donghae’s struggles, he cannot escape as his wrists were tied around the pole of the lamp.Eunhyuk just watched him from afar, a robe draped on his body… all the question fluttering inside his head was how he tolerated watching Donghae’s pained face all night PRESENT The man was gone—he’s dead.Donghae felt the long time weight on his shoulders entirely diminished away. He was standing on the grass lawn his hand tightly clutched on his elbow as he watched the whole warehouse being engulfed in bright flames and the scent of gasoline remained in the air.His past surged up again at the back of his mind and Donghae never failed to cry at the memories he wanted to be erased. He can’t believe he killed a human being… with his own hands and the thought of it was just exhilarating.He looked back at Eunhyuk, whose arms were stretched side by side, as if welcoming the doors of hell before him. Eunhyuk’s blazed; the black color of his eyes was incoherently becoming vivid as the fiery lights reflected on his eyes. Chuckles of delight erupted from his mouth and Donghae just stared at him, utterly stunned by his actions.Minutes passed and the fire grew larger and the dismantled roofs came crashing down but both didn’t move nor flinch. They just stood there, watched the whole building burn until half of it was already in ashes. Donghae’s breathing hitched when Eunhyuk started to mutter things beyond his hearing.And he just stared at him…Until it struck Donghae…Eunhyuk glowered back at him; the distress was entirely evident as his once expression of glee faded.“I love you.” Donghae said once more.But Eunhyuk shook his head and the grief was eating Donghae alive.“Walk with me.”With no hesitation, Eunhyuk took his hand, the cold sensation emitted by his skin made Donghae suddenly feel in ease. They caved into the darker area of the woods, where trees looked entirely the same but they stopped in one huge boulder and Donghae just cornered him there, an arm beside his head and the other on his shoulder.“Explain it to me Eunhyuk. Explain it to me why you can’t love me back?” asked Donghae, his grip tightening on the other’s shoulder.“I’m just going to hurt you Donghae.” Eunhyuk clicked his tongue and looked away. “I’m just going to hurt you more if you knew the truth.”“What truth?” insisted Donghae. “What. Truth.”“I can’t love anyone and you’ll just regret it." Donghae just sighed and leaned on his face to place it on the depth of Eunhyuk’s neck. There was long silence between the two and the only noise that they could hear was just the wind rustling through the wind, the birds chirping around and the sound of their breaths, simultaneously clashing against each other. “That’s bullshit.”Donghae staggered back and pulled out a revolver, attached on his belt, which Eunhyuk completely doesn’t have an idea when he got that thing from his drawer. “That’s the most stupid bullshit I’ve ever heard in my entire lifetime.” He pointed the gun right on Eunhyuk’s forehead, his hand shaking as he was holding the trigger.“It may be outrageous to you.” Eunhyuk smiled on the ground and he spread his arms, welcoming to whatever Donghae was attempting to do.Eunhyuk raised his head and looked straight at Donghae’s troubled eyes, desperately trying to make something out of it. He was continuously shaking his head, tears streaming down from his eyes. He bit his lip, praying to the heavens to help him…But he’s also a murderer… it doesn’t make much a difference from him and the man he killed…“Do what you please but, it is a fact, will remain as a fact and it will never change.” Donghae was so mixed up. “Pull the trigger. Now.” There’s no word in the dictionary left to describe him at this moment. Indeed, Donghae did pull the trigger but his gun was not directed at Eunhyuk… He aimed it on his chest. Donghae’s vision blurred, his knees folded and he slumped on the ground. He was staring at the sky, nearly the same one in his first death. He did not plead for help, even if Eunhyuk was there, a god of the underworld.“I-I’m thirsty.” Donghae managed to whisper and Eunhyuk looked so dumbfounded at the way he looked at him.Eunhyuk knelt down beside him and stroke his blood soiled hair. “I’m sorry. I didn’t bring any carton milk.” Donghae snickered. Who would even bother to bring strawberry milk in a place like this? “I’m sorry. I told you I’ll only hurt you.” Donghae grimaced. He knew it wasn’t right for him to be sorry because he mentioned it already a couple of times that he couldn’t love him back yet he still insisted; it was his fault from the start and he admits it.“It’s okay… just let me rest.”“Let me rest.” Eunhyuk nodded and the reassuring smile crept up on his mouth. “Do as you please,” said Eunhyuk and kissed the cold forehead, slowly, by his lips, he pulled out Donghae’s soul, now separated from his body.Eunhyuk opened his eyes and it flashed white.Donghae’s body was now married to the ground.Eunhyuk stood up and wiped a finger on his lips.“Too bad his story didn’t end like what I expected.”  Fin.   Author's Note : So that's it :) If you don't mind, please support me. I joined a writing contest. right hereand Suhana44 bb.. I'm sorry I've only posted this right now. T_TConstructive Criticism is well appreciated :)