➳2➳ (1/1)

My life flashed before my eyes. How long will I be here for?  Will I ever get married?  Will I have kids?  What would my children think of me?  I hang my head down while 2 officers hold me tightly and push me towards my cell. The officers glance back at each other and the one on the left leaves my side to open the empty cell. The other police woman jerked me back with force. My head shook and I squinted my eyes tightly.  "Don't think of doing anything stupid!" An officer said to me before they both shoved me into the cell. The two disappeared in the dark hallway. I stood there, lifeless. "So, why are you here?" A voice rose from the silence. "Murder." I responed. My face sunk, I shouldn't be here, I thought to myself. "You piece of sh*t. Take someone's life, how dare you?" "I'm a terrible person, I know." I sigh and stare at the cold floor. "I hope you know, I hate you but, since we are cell mates, we must get along. I'm, Soohwa." "Oh. I'm, Eunjoo." I bow down to Soohwa. I get startled from the slap at the head from her. "What are you doing? You don't even act like a criminal." Soohwa's expression was as if I was pitiful, which, I'm sure I am. "Top bunk is yours. We wake up at 6:27am for breakfast and then at 11:43am, we get lunch and go outside for a break. Dinner is at 8:19pm. Meals aren't large like, what you are probably used to." Soohwa smirks. "Are you calling me fat?"  "No, you are just a bit more chunky than most of the girls here." Her taunting laugh fills the cell. "Isn't she funny?" Another voice rises. "Is there another person in our cell?" I ask. "No, I'm across from your cell!" I squint my eyes and look out my cell. I see a woman squeezing her head out between the bars. "Psst. She is crazy, if you hear someone singing, crying or talking in the middle of the night, don't worry, it's her." Soohwa whispers to me. "Hey! Stop telling this beautiful lady I'm crazy! That's not my name! It's Gayun." Soohwa looks at me shaking her head. "I told you." I walked back into the depth of the cell. Soohwa patted the bed that she was sitting on, signaling me to sit down next to her. I sat down instantly regretting every decision I made that day.  This is my reality now, my life. If I want to live, I need to never leave this dark, lonely place. "What's on your mind." Soohwa asks, seeming interested in what I have to say. "My boyfriend." I'm referring to Youngnam. "Oh. I know, you miss him right? Well, if he really loves you, he will visit you." Soohwa says. Well actually, I don't want him to visit. I don't even want to hear his name. That assh*le is the reason why I am here right now!  I go along with Soohwa so she won't suspect anything. "Yeah, I can't wait to see his face." I hide the cringe on my face.  "My son visited me the other day. I missed his first step, first word and his kindergarten graduation. His dad doesn't want me to be in my own son's life!" "Wow, I'm sorry to hear that. Your son's father sounds like a d*ck." I say, feeling sympathetic for her. "Yeah but, I love him. No matter what he does to me, for some reason I can't let go. I don't want to see his face or hear his name but at the end of the day, most of my love goes to him." My eyes widen from these sudden words that Soohwa spoke. I feel the same way as her. I hate Youngnam but, I can't stop my heart from loving him. His abuse is all I'm used to. My father beat me, so I feel good when Youngnam hits me. It serves me right, from all the wrong I've done in my life. Although, I feel disgusted at myself for feeling this way, I can't stop it. I can't let her know about Youngnam though.  "I'm sorry that I can't relate." I look at the floor to hide the face I make when I tell a lie. The time passed with awkward and meaningless talk between the two of us.  "Lights out!" The guard's voice echoed in and out of each cell before the lights turned off.  I climbed up the ladder attached to the bed. I positioned myself, the pillows, and the sheets perfectly before closing my eyes for the night. I will be resting my head on these pillows every night until my sentence is over. I reflect on my life and think to myself, why? Why am I here?  What did I do to deserve this?  I really, deep down, love Youngnam even though he did this to me. I wish I was like most girls and hated the life out of him but, I can't. The way he grabs me vigorously, is the way I love. I sicken myself because I actually love this piece of scum!  But, what about Baekhyun? I love him too. He treats me like a proper man should, and a part of him makes me wish he was mine. I know Baekhyun loves me but, I can't say I fully love him. I'm stuck in the middle. I know I should love Baekhyun but I don't really love him enough to say that I do. Ohh. I hope you enjoyed! I updated today again because the first chapter was short and I felt so bad. Comment on how you feel!  Loveee -krisbaek90