Warmth (1/1)

Wonwoo sat down at the counter with his head on the table. His eyes were fixed on the crowd filling the other side of the room, but actually he could barely recognize any of the faces and movements. There’s this persistent throb on his head which made his vision all fuzzy.It was all blurs of colors and shapes, dancing in front of his eyes.For a while Wonwoo just stayed there, his left cheek felt cold against the table, while the rest of his face was hot.At some point Wonwoo’s eyes began to follow a certain movement. The once blurry image gradually turned clear as Wonwoo focus on it. It was two hands holding. The two hands moved slowly across the room.As the image of the hands grew clearer, Wonwoo felt a sensation in his right hand. The touch of someone else’s hand over his, the warmth that enveloped his hand.Mingyu was not here in the room with him. But that sensation was his.Wonwoo’s mind left the room, floating to that cold day. It was early autumn yet the cold was creeping all over his body. The only part that’s warm was his right hand. His right hand inside Mingyu’s grip.They were walking the street, shoulders touching, hand in hand. When they did that Wonwoo felt this uncomfortable feeling in his stomach, but strangely, he didn’t hate it. Not at all.But the moments never last long. At least not long enough for Wonwoo.“Ha, ha, ha! Did you see her face? She looked like she was going to squeal anytime!” Mingyu said that when they arrived in front of the curry restaurant, where they go their separate ways. Mingyu to the curry restaurant, Wonwoo to the Chinese food at the next block.It was all a joke for Mingyu. The taller guy always enjoyed the look on that stalker girl’s face, even suggested various scenarios to further satisfy that girl’s imagination. Imagination of Wonwoo and Mingyu as a romantic couple.He even said that they could make business with this thing.“In Japan there’s this so-called ‘boys-love cafe’. Girls get in, order food, and enjoy shows of boys feeding each other, holding hands, all the lovey-dovey stuffs. I heard they make quite some money. I think many girls in here would love that kind of cafe too. Maybe we should make one!”Wonwoo wanted to smack that adorable smile from his face when he said that.What was a joke for Mingyu turned out to be something more for Wonwoo. It was his entrance to realization, of Mingyu’s endearing smile and little gestures of kindness. It made Wonwoo conscious of Mingyu’s presence and every change in his voice.It made Wonwoo felt something. But he was the only one who did, and it made him angry.Slowly he felt the cold back on his cheek, and he was back at the bar counter. He blinked a few times, during which the heat in his chest grew bigger. Grunting, he pushed himself up and turned to the bartender.“One more.”Before the bartender could reply, someone on his left said, “No, he’s not having another glass. Sorry.”Wonwoo turned his head to glare at the owner of the voice. It was Jun, unfazed by Wonwoo’s drunken glare. Jun just shrugged and moved towards Wonwoo. He wrapped Wonwoo’s left arm on his shoulder and dragged him towards the door. Wonwoo wanted to protest that he could walk by himself just fine, but once he’s up from the chair, he felt his legs all wobbly.They walked slowly. They could’ve gone faster if Jun could gave Wonwoo a piggyback ride. He could actually, he’s strong enough (or maybe Wonwoo is thin enough), but Jun learned from experience that Wonwoo didn’t like it. Jun didn’t want to risk getting brutally abused by angry drunken Wonwoo.They were walking for a good 15 minutes when Wonwoo suddenly went still, forcing Jun to stop his steps.Jun looked at Wonwoo, trying to find anything wrong. He started to fumble his pockets for any plastic bags, or anything that would do the job if Wonwoo’s stomach decide it’s the right time to throw up. But Wonwoo pulled his left hand on Jun’s shoulder, bringing the two of them closer.Wonwoo’s eyes were directed towards Jun. But they didn’t seem to be looking at Jun at all.“I hate you.”He said, almost like a grunt, before pushing his face towards Jun’s, bringing their lips together in such force that he almost smashed them. Wonwoo stayed like that for a moment, waiting. He felt no reaction on his lips. Instead he felt hands on his shoulders, pulling him apart from Jun.Jun said nothing and just pulled Wonwoo’s arm, trying to get it over his shoulders once again. But Wonwoo pulled back.“Why? Didn’t you say I was hot when we first met? Was that a lie? Am I such an unworthy, hideous, pathetic....”Wonwoo couldn’t see Jun’s face as he felt something hot and wet on his eyes, clouding his vision. But he heard him said softly, “You’re drunk.”It’s the sweetest voice of Jun that Wonwoo ever heard of, but it did nothing to soothe the waves of emotions in Wonwoo’s chest.