I made a little star cry. (1/1)

Kyungsoo's P.O.VThis is wrong. This is definitely not the way I wanted to confess to Kai, but it was over now. Whatever I felt or thought didn't matter anymore. I knew this was a one-sided love; That even If i didn't confess, the answer will always be no.. I also didn't wanted to cry. The tears made my vision blurry. I didn't bothered looking the way I was going, I just wanted to get out of there. I was searching for a place were no one could find me."I bet It'll be purely sexual"  The words kept buzzing in my mind. They made me feel gross. I do have thoughts about doing that kind of thing with Kai, but I think about other things, too. I think about what he'd like to have for dinner. I think if he's doing fine with his classes. I think of his health. I think of him, the whole day.I feel so dirty. As if I betrayed him. He thought of me as his best friend, and yet I thought of him in such a disgusting way.At first, I didn't knew this feeling was called love. I always though I felt this way because he was my best friend since we were kids. But deeply inside, I knew it was different. I never put so much effort in cooking something for anyone but him. I didn't felt comfortable in a friend's house, except his. And so, there were always all kinds of hints that Kai and I didn't shared a normal friendship. Eventually, I asked him what was falling in love like. He said it was wonderful, that it felt like you were flying. That with just hearing the name of that person, you feel happy and all warmed up inside. And so, he began to describe every feeling, that's when I noticed I felt that way, too. I don't think he remembers all the time we've spend together. He doesn't treasure these memories as much as I do.I looked around and found myself in a part of the city I've never been before. The faces of the people, the noises, the buildings, everything was different from what I've know. Although It could have been just my mind playing me tricks. From that point on, I just walked. Walked and walked. It was hard to figure out what to do next. My feet were heavy, my eyes swollen,  and my mind felt like a mess.Maybe If I had controlled myself, If I hadn't told him such things and just pretend like I didn't care about what he said, I wouldn't feel so broken. I would still have that tiny hope that he'd come to love me. I'm such an idiot... I feel like I lost someone who wasn't even mine and now he'd never be.Maybe I'm giving this a lot of thought. Maybe I can fix things in a simple way, I just can't bring myself to think of a way to fix things. I wonder what is Kai doing? how is he feeling? Is he depressed, too? We've been together for so long, He must do. But then again, I didn't thought he'd say something like that.I know he's not a jerk, and that he probably didn't meant it that way. Because I from all people know how gentle and kind he really is.He acts immature, and almost never takes things serious. He says whatever is on his mind. He likes it when people spoil him. He needs a lot of attention. He likes to do pranks to people. He's lazy and stubborn. He's dense.He doesn't realize when he hurts people but... He likes to help people. He likes to feel needed. Even though he forgets a lot of things, he remembers the truly important ones. He always gives good advice. He's protective. When he smiles, somehow everything seems better. He knows how to make people smile. He's caring and thoughtful. He has his flaws, like we all do. But his attributes are much more important. Falling for him was ridiculously easy.And here I am, still thinking about him. I'm such a loser, aren't I?I didn't wanted to go to the apartment, the others will surely ask me what happened and I'm not ready to do that. I'm lost anyway...I'll have to think of a way to find the right way by my own. No one's coming to find me. Kai's P.O.VA long time had passed since Kyunsoo left, but I still couldn't bring myself to move. I didn't quite understood what had happened. Everything was so sudden... In a couple of seconds, I threw my most precious relationship away.Pictures of his teary face kept flashing through my mind. I've always been weak to his tears. When he cries, I get a strong feeling of ... failure and guilt. Maybe because, for some reason, I've always thought that it was my job to make him happy. Always trying to make things right for him. How ironic. I didn't meant what I said, I never thought he liked me. I don't see why would he ever forgive me. He even said he wanted to forget me. Shit. I'm getting more depressed by my own thoghts. It's no good being alone right now, God knows what I'll do if I keep thinking like this.I searched for my phone in the pockets of my jeans. But then I just stared at it. I froze again. That's when a middle aged woman came closer, she asked if I was okay, If I needed help. "can you...can you search for a number in my phone, and diall it for me?" Even when I talked I felt pain. She did, then she gave me one of those looks that make you feel safe. "Everything's going to be ok." she smiled "There's nothing that could break true love apart" She winked, and left. She must have seen everything.."...What do you want?" Kris asked in his usual bad-mood tone. "I was in the middle of something very important.""Is-Is that so? then I guess I'll call you later, sorry" He must have heard the pain in my voice."...Get your ass here, right now. I'll try to give you the best advice I can, but I don't promise you're going to like it" He hung up.I had to give myself commands in order to move. Slowly, I walked to Kris's house. I knocked the door and instead of Kris, there was this guy that reminded me of a...panda?"Oh, Hi. Come on in," He sounded happy...Lucky... "Kris, your friend is here"Kris came out of one of the rooms, he still had his bitch face on. "Hey, what happened?"" I...I've been dumped" He made a surprised expression"I didn't know you were dating anyone""I wasn't. That's one of the reasons it hurts so much""You had a fight with the person you like, right?" The panda guy said suddenly. I didn't noticed he was still here."Now, Tao. Kai doesn't like anyone. He acts like an idiot around everyone and" He changed his stare to me, as if something popped up in his mind "Wait, it was Kyungsoo-ah, wasn't it? Shit Kai, what did you do?"I didn't gave him an aswer right away. Instead, I stared at the floor. Kyungsoo's tears were enough to make mines roll down my cheeks. "I lost him," I managed to say between my sobbing "I made my little star cry"There was a silence, before Tao decided to speak his mind."It's not about what he did, Gege." Tao said "It's about what he's going to do to get him back. What are you going to do, JongIn? How much do you want him to forgive you""More than anything. I've never felt so destroyed before... I don't get why. I've fought with friends before, but not even the worst of those fights made me feel half of bad as I'm feeling right now." I tried to wipe away the tears, but it was useless. New ones kept appearing in my eyes.Tao and Kris looked at each other. Kris gave a deep breathe and sighted "This is what you're going to do: You go back to your apartment, you think about this and as soon as you see Kyungsoo, You apologize to him and tell him how you feel."  How I feel? Like an Idiot.I nodded and did as they said. Think about it...I don't know what to think anymore. The only thing I know is that I wasn't able to make him happy. I failed.When I opened the door of the apartment, I felt scared. "Kyungsoo?" I asked when I walked in. There was no sound. I guess he hasn't come back yet. I was about to go in my room, when I noticed the door of his room was opened. I didn't gave it a second thought and walked in. As expected, everything was perfectly organized and clean. In his desk rested a notebook. I opened it and smile at the title "JongIn's favourite food recipes" Ah, that's right. Kyungsoo always makes me delicious food. Under the notebook, there was a book. It's the same one I told him about some days ago. And so, I explored his room and found all kinds of little details that I've never stopped to appreciate before. Even when these ones made me smile so much.In the middle of the room was his bed. I jumped to it, grabbed a pillow, and gave a deep breathe. I can't believe he smells this good. I felt a heartthrob, my mind was filled with thoughts of him and that's when I understood what made our relationship different from a normal friendship. Agh just fuck it. Even if it's gay what does it matter? I can't believe I was being so stubborn. "Please come back to me, I'm lost without you" That's the last thing I remember before falling asleep.Later that night"...Kai?" How nice. I'm dreaming of my star's voice "Hey, kkamjong, wake up"I opened my eyes slowly, I recognized a beautiful face before my eyes and jumped to him."Woah! what are you doing?! get off, I'm still mad!" He cried."Kyungsoo! I'm sorry, I'm very sorry! Those things I said, I didn't meant them! Please forgive me. Please come back to me. I desperately need you. I know It's been just some hours but they felt like hell. I'm sorry because I never noticed how you felt...and I'm sorry because I didn't understood that I..." I looked into his eyes, ah yes. It's definitely true "That I like you...No. More like, I love you. Please, don't give up on me. Tell me you still love me. Tell me you don't hate me, please." I was crying by this point.He sighed "No, you're saying that because I confessed to you. There's no need for you to go that far for-""It's not like that!" He was surprised at how I yelled to him "It's not like that at all. When I saw you crying, my heart completely broke. When you said you didn't wanted to talk to me anymore, i felt desperate. When you said you wanted to forget me, I felt like killing myself. And when you left me, I felt completely lost. I'm sorry I didn't noticed this before...but the way you act, your little gestures, the way you talk to me, your voice, your smile, everything...I feel like everything belongs to me. I don't want you to leave me, but I don't want to be just friends either. I want to hold your hand, I want to kiss you and touch you, I want to sleep in the same bed with you, I want to go on dates with you and be with you forever. I've...I've always felt like you belong by my side but I didn't knew such feeling was called love. So please, go out with me. If you already got over me. I'll make you fall in love with me again. Whatever you want, I'll give it to you. I want to go back to visit your parents, and be introduced as your boyfriend. What do you say...?"I was really scared to hear the answer. The room was silent for a second, I heard Kyungsoo's sobbing."You...how could I ever hate you? T-that's what I hate of you the most...the fact that no matter what you do, I'll always forgive you...because I really love you. I really do" He cling tightly to my shirt, letting his warm tears die on it. "From now on, you're not allowed to leave my side. You have to take full responsibility of making me unable to like someone else."I cried again. But this time, It was of happiness. He's mine. I managed to steal a star from the sky, I thought as I kissed my beloved.------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------omg It's finally done  -w- Sorry it took so long. sosososos what do you think? For some reason, I never think the chapters are good enough...I'm sorry I have't write about the other couples lately, specially SuLay and Baekyeol ... So, next chapter's gonna be (mostly) about them <3Thanks for subscribing c: love youuu~