Chapter 10 (1/1)

Kangin woke up the next morning in his bed and felt his whole body ache. He remembered sneaking in the middle of the night, careful not to wake anybody up and hitting various objects on the way to his room. A dirty smile spread on his face as his fingers traced the nails mark on his shoulder.He stepped out to the kitchen, still rubbing at his eyes. Heechul was sitting with his laptop and drinking coffee, hardly giving him a glance.“Morning”, he said on his way to make his own cup of coffee.“Morning. Rough night?”“It was OK”, Kangin put an extra spoon of sugar in his coffee, figuring he could use the energy.“Management wants to talk to you. Leeteuk asked me to tell you to be ready at twelve sharp. He’s going with you”“What about?”, Kangin was getting worried, it sounded too official.“What do you think?”“Heechul, stop playing”, he set next to him, “I’m not in the mood”“Sungmin got into trouble last night. Apparently, he disappeared too early, and they couldn’t reach him for his date”“What date?”“I don’t know his name. I offered to go instead of him, but when the guy saw me he got scared”, Heechul smiled widely, his dimples showing, “I guess he wanted the cute one”Kangin wasn’t sure what to say. “I didn’t know he did that”“No, you didn’t. It rarely happens, it must have been someone important.”“And they want to talk to me about that?”“I guess you haven’t seen the fans reaction yet, ha?”, Heechul turned his laptop towards Kangin. There was a video of him playing, a fancam someone took of him and Sungmin at the event last night. His eye caught a few words in the remarks below, the word gay repeating again and again, between cute and pretty, and fat.“They want to talk to me about that? It was just a hug, they tell us to hug each other all the time”“It was more than a hug, Kangin, and it’s probably not going to be just about that. Just smile and promise them you’ll stop drinking, lose weight, be on time and whatever else they might say. You’re making them too much money right now, don’t worry, but be smart about it, ok?”, Heechul turned serious, his cat-like eyes staring right at him behind his glasses.Kangin sighed. He wasn’t looking forward for whatever it was that was going to happen.The meeting was short and to the point . There was nothing about Sungmin, only about his own behavior and image, and Kangin apologized and promised to be more focused and work harder. Leeteuk was a nervous rack by the time they came back to the car.“I hate these things”, he kept saying, “you have to be more professional, Kangin, I don’t want another meeting like that with you. I’m the leader, but there’s a limit to how much I can baby sit everybody. If you start fucking up, you’ll have to deal with it on your own, do you understand?”“Yes”, Kangin promised again as his head started pounding, “I understand, I’ll work harder” He got a text from Sungmin to meet him in his room as he got back from the meeting and was getting ready for his next schedule. He didn’t want to see him, but Sungmin insisted. Kangin was worried that maybe they had a meeting with the younger member as well, and that maybe something was wrong. He was still trying to work out the situation in his head when he entered Sungmin’s room, but was surprised to find Sungmin sitting on the bed, waiting with a smile and a fancy box on his lap.“What’s that?”“I got you something”“It’s not my birthday”“I know, but after last night…”, he got up excitedly and pushed Kangin to sit, handing him the present, “I thought I should get you something”“Get me something? you’re acting stupid, I’m not your fucking girlfriend”Sungmin noticed Kangin’s harsh tone, but ignored it, “I know that, I just felt like…”“I only have an hour before my next schedule, if we keep talking we won’t have time, and I can’t be late”, he took off his jacket and loosed his belt in mechanical movements.“Is something wrong?”Kangin felt his anger fighting to surface, the pressure getting to him, “You missed a date last night”“So?”, Sungmin cut in, “Since when do you care?”“I didn’t know you did things like that”“You never asked”, Sungmin was getting upset himself, but tried to keep his calm, “I told them I didn’t want to do parties anymore, but they insisted on keeping the individual dates, and I didn’t think there would already be any…”Kangin didn’t know what to do with his hands anymore, he wanted the other one to stop talking, it felt like a match went off and something in him started to boil, “You didn’t think… how could you not think? Look at this”, Kangin picked up a pink hat, “look at all this pink girly stuff, no wonder everybody thinks you’re gay”“I am gay, Kangin”“Well, I’m not!”, he yelled, “And aren’t you a man? What man wears these things, what man wraps a present in pink paper and fucks men because they ask you to?”, the words just kept coming out of his mouth, and Kangin couldn’t stop them. He was so angry, so angry about everything, that he felt if he didn’t get out, he was going to punch someone.“I… I don’t…”“Don’t what? why do you always stutter?”, he got up and Sungmin took a step back, “I can’t be here anymore. I’m not like you, I can't whore fuck for my living, I have to work, and I got a warning today, a fucking warning, because apprantly I don't work hard enough.""A warning? what are you talking about...", Sungmin tried to reach out to him but Kangin hit his hand away. He was trying to follow Kangin's words but with every word he felt like he was breaking a little, piece by piece."Don't touch me, I’m a man and this is just wrong, why do you have to be like this?”, he got out of the room and made it to end of the hallway when he remembered he left his jacket behind. He took a few steps back but stopped when he heard the crying. Sungmin was crying. It wasn’t a quiet sniff or a soft sob, but a full blown crying, coming out in waves, out of someone in pain. He never heard Sungmin crying like this, and he stood there, frozen. It felt like a decision, like there was a line in front of him that he had to make a choice if he wanted to cross. He knew that if he went back to the room and took the crying man in his arms, he won’t be able to let go, they’ll talk and things will change, and he wasn’t ready for that. He turned away from the sound and crushed into Eunhyuk. The other gave him an angry look and when he realized Kangin was not moving, rushed into Sungmin’s room. Kangin made it to his next schedule and functioned like a robot, doing his job. Sungmin called once about two hours later, but he didn’t pick up. When he called again, Kangin stared at the screen, stalling for what seemed like forever, until the noise stopped. Sungmin didn’t call again.--------------------------------------------------------Just two more parts! I'm sorry this story is so long.There will be a little bit of Kyumin, but this story is mainly about Kangin. And btw, please don't hate Kangin, I feel like I'm doing a bad job with explaining he's very conflicted and under pressure, but he's not a bad guy.