Complicated. (1/1)

Kim Taeyeon. Yes, my name is Kim Taeyeon. I am 24 years old and I am in love with my best friend, Tiffany Hwang. Here’s a thing. She is in love with someone else, and lets’ just say she found her perfect guy. Now, the worst part of it, I am desperate to have her in my life. I have been in love with her for 3 years. I tried to forget about my feelings and just move on with my life but I can’t. I myself, is in a relationship with a girl. Yes, Fany knows about it. She knows I’m not straight and she knows I have someone else but what she doesn’t know is I hooked up with another girl just to forget her. I know, I know I said I want to fight for her but sometimes it is too much for my heart to take. My girlfriend is the only place I can forget about Tiffany for a while. Now, this girl right here.. I do care for her so much, and I love her but not as much as I love Tiffany. People said I’m stupid chasing something impossible. Some people call me a jerk because I don’t appreciate my girlfriend. What they don’t know, my girlfriend cheated on me before. Yeah, she kissed another girl which is her best friend. She said it was just a lust, she don’t even love her. Being a good girl like I always am, I forgive her. Of course, I told Tiffany all about it. It’s weird, when I’m with her, I feel so comfortable. I forgot every problem, every hardship in life and I forgot about everyone around me. The last time I get in touch with Tiffany was a week ago. So..i decided to check her again on Twitter. And I saw this. @ByunTaeng Tae~! If you go to the college, tell me alright?? I was thinking, why people always taking advantage of me. Even my own girlfriend took me for granted. Sometimes, I hate my mum for teaching how to be nice with people and this is what I got. I realise, I’m the only one who initiate the conversation with her. She will find me if she need something. If not, then she doesn’t even bother to text me, or call me or even tweet me. Is it so hard to drop by and say hi?   @MushroomFany Yeah ok. So when will you come here? I know I sounded so cold, but I can’t help it. I am so disappointed in her. I hate that I love her. An hour passed by. She hasn’t replies my tweet. 12 hours later. Still no tweets from her.  1 day.  I almost giving up. I deleted my tweets that I send to her.  Tomorrow, I decided to go to the college and give the payments. So I text her.  “Fany, I’m going to the college tomorrow.”  No smile, no emoticons, no laughing, no LOL, no nothing. Just a cold and plain text to her.  An hour after that, I checked my twitter.  @ByunTaeng I probably will comeback next 2 weeks. Sorry I can’t reply your text, I’m too busy. L Anyway, tonight I’ll tell my dad to give you the payments. J   I don’t know. I feel she already draw the line between us. I can’t even go near her.  @MushroomFany Ok. Anything just text or tweet me.  I am so pissed off.  Yes, I let it out to people around me including my girlfriend.   After the cheating incident, she promised not to contact her best friend unless it is something important.  And yet, she still go out with her. Having skinship every time they meet.   I know about it, but I pretend I don’t.  I am killing myself over here.  About Tiffany..i don’t know if I should give up or not.  I really don’t know what I wanna do next. Let me just say, I think this is the lowest point in my life this year.  _______________________________________________________________________________________________________________________COMMENTS AND SUBSCRIBE! P/S : DON'T PLAY WITH SOMEONE ELSES FEELINGS.