Thoughts (1/1)

A good person like you, a good person like you,

With a good heart like you,

A gift as great as youHow lucky that I’m the person who will try his hardest to protect you

where else to look for? – Super Junior; No Other M I N H OIt had been a week, an entire week, and still Minho couldn’t formulate tangible reasons to explain his actions.  He hated to admit it to himself, but the little fluffy-haired brunette he’d been driving to and from school every day had succeeded in puzzling him into being completely stumped.  He’d initially brushed off the question after the younger had told him that if they didn’t leave they’d be late for school, however as the day had progressed he’d found himself distracted by the morning’s events.  He’d attempted to slap on a smile and forget about it toward the end of the day once department and showcase activities had rolled around, and had succeeded, up until he’d seen his dongsaeng all upset over his best friend leaving without even saying goodbye.Worry had exploded within him and he’d had to fight it harshly in order to keep too much of it from showing.  He’d tried to talk to Taemin to see what was wrong and try to help him feel better, but he’d succeeded only in getting light reassurances from the younger that there had been nothing wrong despite the look on the younger’s face that had proved otherwise.  He’d attempted to help the younger feel better by starting conversation in the car, only to later be met with an awkward silence because the boy had begun gushing about his really cool Hyuk-hyung and Minho had been rendered practically speechless thanks to the tight, fiery ball that had formed in the pit of his stomach at the way the younger’s eyes had sparkled as he’d spoken about his hyung.The uncomfortable feeling in his gut had beckoned forth more questions still.  He’d found himself asking what exactly the feeling was and why it bothered him so much to see the younger so happy when speaking about his hyung.  Then his questioning had reminded him of the fact that he seemed to care so much for the younger for no apparent reason and before he’d known it, he’d had a tornado of jumbled questions and jarred confusion eating away at his sanity for the next week.Being a relatively quick-minded and logical thinker who was able to quietly decipher most problems swiftly and with ease, Minho was not used to being stuck on an issue for so long.  It didn’t help that the source of his thoughts accompanied him to and from school every single day (although admittedly that part was his own fault, and in all honesty he didn’t mind the boy himself – he was quite overjoyed, actually, whenever the boy was around; it was just the thoughts that were provoked in his presence that disturbed him).  All of the time he spent around Taemin only added insult to injury in his case, with new thoughts, new ideas, and more unrecognizable emotions being thrown into his frazzled and hectic mind.As a result, he currently found himself absentmindedly running a rough hand through his curly, light-brown locks in slight frustration, brow furrowed and a sigh escaping him as he blankly stared at the white ceiling of his room, his thoughts swarming endlessly.  The red drapes he kept on the large, ceiling-to-floor window of his large room were pulled open completely, allowing the moonlight to spill into the otherwise dark room.  It was well past midnight and he had school in the morning, but he couldn’t bring himself to sleep.  He was fed up and tired of the thoughts bugging him all day; he wanted to put an end to those thoughts and resolve the issue once and for all.  Tonight.He vaguely heard the sound of his phone vibrating and automatically reached a hand out to see who it was.  It took a few long seconds of squinting intensely at the phone’s bright screen before the name on the screen actually registered as Donghae’s, and even longer still for the text beneath it to become coherent in his jumbled mind.Minho-ah, I need your help!His thoughts dissipated instantly as the words ‘need’ and ‘help’ fully sunk in.  He quickly unlocked his phone and typed back a ‘What’s wrong, hyung?’ before gently placing the device next to his pillow.  It was on the bed for a total of two seconds before it started vibrating with the words ‘incoming call’ flashing on the screen.  Minho scrunched his face up at the bright light as he accepted the call and pressed the phone to his ear.  “Hello?”His voice was hoarse and raspy from having not said a single word for hours straight.  It was a sharp contrast to the highly animated, smooth and deep voice on the other side of the line.  “Oh my god, Minho-ah, I need your help!”“I know, hyung.  I saw your text,” Minho responded with a small sigh, rubbing a suddenly itchy eye.“Minho,” he heard his elder whine out on the other side of the line, “this is serious.  I really need your help.”He fought down another sigh, feeling a bit of exasperation creeping into him.  “You know, hyung, sometimes I feel like you’re the dongsaeng,” he said tiredly.  “What’s the situation?  What do you need help with?”There was the sound of rustling on the other line – Minho imagined it was the elder getting into a more comfortable position – before Donghae spoke.  “Well it has to do with the group…”  His voice was soft and almost hesitant, as if he was nervous to speak about it.  Minho’s eyebrows pulled down into a small frown.  “What is it?  Are you guys not getting along all of a sudden?”A moment passed.  “Well…”Another sigh escaped Minho.  “Listen, if it’s about you guys not getting along, we can talk about it after school tomorrow with the whole group and the other department heads.”  The idea suddenly had Minho yawning into his free hand.  He felt the beginnings of exhaustion seeping into him.“No, Minho-ah!  It’s not that!”  Donghae sounded both desperate and exasperated at once, all the while a bit of anxiety seeming to lace his words.  Minho felt his scowl deepen.  “Aigo, then what is it?”  He rubbed an eye.“Well…there’s this one kid-“  Minho immediately cut his elder off.  “What?  Is he being a troublemaker?”“Wha-?  No!  Minho-ah, let me finish!”“Aish, aish, okay, okay!  Then get to the point and spit it out already!”In any other situation, he was sure he would’ve laughed at the way Donghae audibly gulped on the other side of the line.  “Well,” he heard his dark-auburn haired hyung begin, “this kid I was telling you about, he’s cool.  He’s from the dance department.”“Dance department?  What’s his name?”Donghae paused for a moment before hesitantly responding.  “Uh…Hyukjae…”Minho mulled the name over in his head; he was sure he knew who the guy was (hell he’d thought about Taemin saying the name with practically utter amazement and the burning in his stomach it incited all week), yet he was racking his head to put a face to the name.  After a moment of intense thought, it hit him.  “Oh, you mean the one with the blue hair?”He could practically hear Donghae nodding on the other side of the line.  “Yeah, him!  Anyway he’s really cool and he’s great at dancing,” Minho scoffed briefly as he pondered how much Donghae sounded like Taemin had when they’d been in the car the previous week before returning his full attention to what his hyung was saying, “and over the past week we’ve gotten really friendly.  He’s fun to hang around with.”Minho waited for his elder to continue, only to realize that the elder was waiting for his input.  “Okay, so you guys are becoming good friends.  So what?”There was the sound of more rustling from the other side, and then a soft, almost frustrated sigh.  “Well…it’s just that…”  The elder paused once again, causing Minho to run a hand through his hair and prompt his hyung.  “Yes, hyung?”That seemed to encourage the redhead as he set off on a short (and seemingly nervous) rant.  “Well Minho-ah, every time I see him, I get this weird feeling in the pit of my stomach and for some reason, I like being really affectionate with him.  And I get really nervous when I’m around him until we actually start talking and goofing off and having fun and stuff.  We sat together at lunch these past couple of days and at first it was awkward ‘cause we’re not used to sitting with each other –“Minho stopped Donghae mid-rant.  “Hang on, what?  Is this where you’ve been at lunch all this time, leaving me alone?”  There was a short silence before the elder chuckled guiltily.  “Eh, yeah.  Sorry Minho-ah.”He felt his curiosity spike as realization hit him; Hyukjae was in the dance department, which meant that at lunch, he probably sat with dance department members.  Before he could stop himself, Minho found himself asking, “Wait, who was sitting at the table with you guys?”“Umm,” Donghae responded, “well there’s that elite girl with the blond hair from the dance department – I think her name’s Hyoyeon?  Anyway, there’s her, and then Hyuk,” – Minho fought the urge to snort at the nickname Donghae had unconsciously let slip – “now me, umm…Oh there’s that weird first year elite kid, Jongin, some kid from his group that he’s always talking to – I think his name is Sehun –“Minho cut Donghae off for what seemed to be the billionth time that night.  “Wait, does the leader of the dance department sit there too, by any chance?”“You mean the cute little skinny short one?  Taemin?”“Yeah, him.”“Oh yeah, he’s there but he doesn’t really talk to anyone unless it’s Hyoyeon or Hyuk.”Minho felt his previously intrigued face pull down into a slight, suspicious frown.  “He doesn’t talk to Jongin?”  The question slipped before he could fully process what he was doing.“Oh no, he does, but the conversations are always weird.  They’re both weird.  It’s like they talk about things old friends would talk about but the conversations themselves sound awkward and usually fall flat quickly, and then Jongin goes back to talking to Sehun and Taemin goes back to being quiet.”Really now?  Minho pursed his lips in thought at the new information.  As far as he’d known from what he’d witnessed and what Taemin had told him, the younger and his dongsaeng were both very close to each other and hardly ever awkward.  Could that Jongin kid really be ignoring Minnie?  The thought made him feel a sudden sense of slight anger, suspicion easing its way into his already full mind.  It was Donghae that broke him out of his thoughts.“Yeah, but anyway, Minho-ah, like I was saying: I’m cool with the other members of the group but it’s different with Hyukjae.  I get all these weird feelings I can’t even name around him.”And then there was that; Minho had an odd sense of déjà vu at Donghae’s words.  He was silent for a moment, contemplating the fact that Donghae’s situation seemed scarily like his own, before he shook it off and said, “Well then that just means that you guys click really well, I guess.  You’re really good friends – or going to be at least.”  But for some reason, he found the explanation hollow and weak.“But what about the whole skinship part?”“You’ve always been clingy, hyung.”There was silence on both ends for a short while.  Minho was caught up in his thoughts the entire time, knowing somewhere in the back of his mind that the only reason Donghae was silent was because the redhead was caught up in his own thoughts as well.  Once again, however, it was the elder who broke the silence.“But Minho-ah,” he practically whined out, “we’re really good friends and I never get nervous around you.”Minho sighed, massaging the space between his eyebrows with his free hand as he said, “I guess you’ll be better friends with Hyukjae-ssi or whatever.  I don’t know, hyung.  Maybe it’s because I’m your dongsaeng and Hyukjae-ssi is like just as ancient as you are.”  He frowned when the thought But I get nervous around Minnie sometimes flitted through his mind before quickly disappearing into the cloud of jumbled thoughts scrambling from corner to corner in his brain.Another short silence followed before Donghae spoke again, this time unsurely.  “I don’t know.”“Well if you don’t know, then I definitely don’t,” Minho retorted, rubbing his eye yet again and biting back a yawn.  What is with this damn itchy eye?  I must be getting sleepy.“You’re no help,” the elder complained playfully on the other side.  Minho felt a small, fond smile play over his lips.  “You don’t say,” he quipped sarcastically.  “You called me after all, hyung.”“Yah, seriously, why did I even bother?”“Because you’re hopeless, hyung.”“Aish, whatever!  This is the last time I’m ever calling you for help!”  But Minho could hear the other’s soft, breathy laughter echoing digitally along the line.“Right, right, you tell yourself that, hyung.”  A playful smirk spread over his own lips at the familiar teasing.“Aish, whatever,” Donghae repeated, still half-laughing, “I’m hanging up now!”“Okay.  Goodnight, hyung.”  Minho grinned amusedly at the sudden change of tone in their conversation.  If there was one thing he could always count on Donghae for, it was humoring him at any possible time with the most random things.  “Goodnight, dongsaeng-ah,” he heard Donghae say mockingly before the call ended.  He let out a small laugh as he removed the phone from his ear and pressed the ‘end’ button on his side as well.Carefully placing the phone back on the nightstand by his bed and plugging it back into the charger, Minho curled up facing the moonlight and tugged the blanket by his feet up to his shoulders.  The beginnings of exhaustion he’d felt when he’d first picked up the phone to speak to his elder had transformed into huge waves of drowsiness, crashing into him every few seconds, forcing his eyes to flutter shut and his breathing to deepen.  He was asleep within minutes, the thoughts that had been plaguing him for the past week pushed back to the farthest recesses of his mind in favor of letting unusual dreams of a skinny, wavy-haired boy take over.UMinho awoke the following morning to the sun shining on his face.  That’s weird, he thought as he sat up and rubbed his eyes clear of any signs of sleep.  It’s only six thirty; the sun is never out this early this time of year.  He muffled a yawn as he cracked an eye open to glance out of the large glass wall in his room.  The sun was still low, but high enough to taint the sky a warm orange as it rose.  He frowned at the sight.  Usually whenever he woke up at six thirty for school during the winter, the sky was painted a dark blue with barely any hint, if at all, that the sun was beginning to rise.He reached out a hand to grab his phone and almost fell off the side of the bed as he glanced at the time.  Oh my god, oh my god, oh my god, Choi Minho what have you done?  It’s not six thirty, it’s seven twenty!  Oh my god, Choi Minho get your lazy ass up, you are late.  You are almost an entire hour late!  Get up, get up, get up!He swiftly grabbed a towel off the rack where he kept his toiletries, a pair of underwear, jeans, a black v-neck, and a gray blazer, and practically dove into the bathroom.  His shower lasted all of five minutes, although the intense scrubbing he’d done in those five minutes left him exiting the shower cubicle red-faced as he dried himself off.  He shoved his clothes on, haphazardly ran a hand through his hair, and slung his school bag over his shoulder before almost sprinting out of his room with his phone clutched in his hand.He grabbed his keys off of the hook in the entrance hall, almost tripping over his own two feet in an effort to avoid bumping into the table containing his mother’s prized vase in the center of the room, and rushed out of the front door.  He ended up slamming the heavy oak door by accident on his way out, although in all honesty, he couldn’t bring himself to care.  He glanced at the time on his dashboard the moment he plopped into the driver’s seat and turned the ignition in his car.  Shit, it’s seven thirty-five already.He threw the car into reverse while reaching into his pocket and tapping Taemin’s name in his contacts.  He tapped on the number that appeared and smashed the phone to his ear as he backed out of the garage, then the driveway, and onto the street.  He expertly threw the car into drive with one hand and pulled out of the street with the same hand as the phone began to ring.  He tapped his fingers against the steering wheel as it rang once, twice, three times, a fourth.Finally, after he was absolutely sure that the call was going to be sent to voicemail, Taemin picked up.  “Hello?”“Taemin-ah,” he half-yelled out, “I’m so sorry!  I’ll be there in like ten minutes; I woke up really late!  Don’t go anywhere, I’ll be there soon!”“Ah, but Minho-hyung-““Don’t worry about it, Minnie; I’ll be there in ten.  We’ll be fine.”  Without even bothering to give the younger time to respond, he ended the call and sped down the road, heart pounding in a way that led him to believe it was far more than just the adrenaline of being in a rush.IMinho couldn’t help the small, relieved smile that escaped him when the bell rang, signaling that the lunch hour had begun.  He swiftly but neatly packed his things into his bag, zipped it, and slung it over his shoulder.  He walked out of the classroom with the conversation he’d had with Donghae the previous night playing in his mind – particularly the part about Donghae sitting at the same table as Taemin.He wasn’t sure why he wanted so badly to sit with the younger; all he knew was that he soon found himself in the cafeteria spotting Donghae next to that bright-blue haired friend of his and striding over with a smile breaking out over his face.  He placed his food down on the table gently and slipped his bag off of his shoulder with ease as he took his seat – right next to Donghae and directly in front of Taemin.  “Hey everyone,” he greeted happily, placing a hand on Donghae’s shoulder and flashing Taemin a grin.  Donghae threw an “Oh, hey Minho-ah,” over his shoulder in response before continuing some conversation he’d been having with Hyukjae.  Taemin, on the other hand, jumped in surprise before giving him a sweet smile.“Hi Minho-hyung,” he said after a moment of silence in which Minho did nothing but flash the younger his friendly grin.  He didn’t miss the way the lead dancer’s dongsaeng glanced at him and threw him a discontented look in the midst of a conversation with some blond kid Minho didn’t recognize – although from what he could pick up in the short span of seconds in which he made eye contact with the first-year dancer, he could’ve sworn he heard the blond speak with a lisp.  Jongin was the first to break the eye contact, letting out a huff and turning back to continue his conversation with the blond.Minho sat in silence for a few moments, the grin on his face fading into a ponderous frown as he mulled over what he could’ve possibly done to his dongsaeng’s best friend to make him scowl like that.  He thought for a total of roughly fifteen seconds before he came up blank, shrugged it off, and turned to face the person he had, for some reason, been extremely eager to see since the previous period.“Hi Minnie.”  His charismatic smile was back as he turned his full attention on the skinny brunette in front of him and began eating.  The younger just tilted his head the slightest before saying, “Uh, hi Minho-hyung…again.”Minho’s smiling lips shifted from charisma to amusement in a heartbeat at the confused look his dongsaeng gave him.  “Hi Taemin-ah.”Silence stretched for a moment, and then, “Uh…Hi Minho-hyung.”Minho’s amused smile only stretched as the seconds pressed on in silence between them yet again.“Taemin-ah.”“Hmm?”“Hi.”  A goofy grin was now plastered on the elder’s face, amusement flickering in his gaze at the way Taemin’s own features were contorted into one of confusion.  When the younger caught sight of Minho’s goofy grin, however, he began to grin himself.  Minho saw the amusement rising in his eyes.“Taeminnie!”“Yes, hyung?”“Hi!”“Hi, hyung.”  Taemin’s smiled broadened.“Minnie-ah.”“What is it, hyung?”“Hi.”  Minho felt the inner workings of laughter beginning to bubble somewhere within the pit of his stomach.“Hi, hyung.”Another moment of silence.  It registered somewhere in the back of Minho’s mind that neither of them were even bothering with their food.“Dongsaeng-ah.”Taemin playfully glanced around the cafeteria before pointing a finger at himself, the amused spark in his eye growing dramatically as their little game pressed on.  When Minho nodded, slapping a hand over his mouth to hold down his laughter, Taemin spoke again.“Yes, hyung?”“Hi.”  Minho couldn’t hold the small laugh that escaped him.  It bubbled out in the air between them, rising up and dissipating into the air within a matter of milliseconds, although the effect left behind was evident a fraction of a second later, when Taemin had to cover his mouth with a hand in order to muffle his own small laugh.“Hi, hyung,” he responded after a moment.  Then silence overtook them again.  Time ticked by as they looked at each other, willing the other with his eyes to be brave enough to break the silence and see if they could continue.  Minho felt his lungs burning as he held his breath to prevent the laughter he felt from escaping from between his teeth.  He wasn’t sure how much time they let pass by with the way they were; all he knew was that with each passing second, his lungs only screamed louder and louder.An eternity could’ve passed and he wouldn’t have been able to tell.  He felt himself slowly reaching his limit, but he could also see the younger one struggling, his face flushing furiously as he held his hands over his mouth, eyes crinkled into small crescents of amusement.“Are you guys okay?”And they burst out laughing – loud and rambunctious and wild.  Minho briefly saw Taemin throw his head into his arms onto the table before he did the same and banged a fist on the surface.  He could feel the stares of the people not only at his table but of the people at the surrounding tables as well; he couldn’t have cared less.  The burning in his lungs was slowly alleviating as he gulped in breath after breath after breath of precious air before falling back into hysterics, tears piling up in the corner of his eyes.He could hear his dongsaeng gasping for air as he laughed directly in front of him, no doubt wiping tears from his own eyes as well.  Time continued to stretch on, although this time it wasn’t in complete silence – it was in laughter, and it seemed to stretch on for the rest of eternity yet again before the boys could begin to calm down.Minho lifted his head from his arms and met Taemin’s smiling gaze.  Something within him flipped at the way the younger’s face seemed to be glowing with joy – and it made his heart stop and his laughter subside.  He held onto his small smile out of sheer nonchalance, although on the inside, he was no longer smiling; he was confused and curious.  He felt the thoughts from the previous night threatening to burst back into his brain and shove violently away any other thoughts that might have occupied his mind throughout the day.  It was Donghae that saved him from allowing his mind to teeter off the border of obsessive perplexity.“Are you guys okay?”Both Minho and Taemin, the latter still giggling, turned to look at the redhead with the amusement still evident on their faces – for despite Minho’s slight deviation of thought, he still found the situation highly humorous.“Seriously,” Hyukjae interjected.  “All Hae did was ask if you guys are okay and then you suddenly burst out laughing like two hyenas on crack.  I don’t think I’ve ever heard Taemin laugh so hard.”  He raised a dark eyebrow at both of the boys, Taemin bursting out into a short fit of laughter yet again and Minho raising an amused eyebrow as he turned and looked at his auburn-haired hyung.  “Hey, hyung, how come you don’t let me call you ‘Hae’?”The blush on Donghae’s face was priceless and it sent both Taemin and Minho into loud guffaws.  When Minho heard Hyukjae say, “Wait, so I’m the only one that calls you ‘Hae’,” in a voice that seemed to be pleasantly surprised, he laughed a bit harder.  He could hear Taemin laughing along with him at their hyungs and their awkwardly adorable newfound friendship.The fit didn’t last long, but it was enough to brighten the twinkle in Taemin’s eye, and Minho didn’t fail to notice.  He gave the younger a kind smile – which was quickly returned just as strongly.  They sat in silence for a few moments, just smiling at each other and Minho could’ve sworn he saw something almost like gratitude in Taemin’s expression.Their easy silence was interrupted by Donghae abruptly stating, “Dongsaeng-ah, you never smile at me like that, and I’ve known you for years.”  Minho felt his face begin to burn as he looked over to see Donghae feigning offense, a hand dramatically placed against his forehead.  Hyukjae took advantage of the moment and added, “Yah, Tae!  You too!  You never smile at me that sweetly, and I’m supposed to be your favorite hyung, remember?”Minho probably would’ve smiled had the words “your favorite hyung” not exited Hyukjae’s mouth.  For some reason he couldn’t quite formulate into words, he felt slightly personally offended by the statement.  He furrowed his brow and let his eyes roam over from Donghae to Hyukjae, pursing his lips as the sapphire-haired boy began to laugh with Donghae, latching a hand onto the latter’s shoulder and doubling over in his seat while clutching his stomach.Minho felt amusement seeping back into him at the sight, chasing away any thoughts that might’ve threatened to bring to his consciousness the thoughts that had plagued him the night before.  He rolled his eyes with a fond smile on his face after a moment before turning to Taemin.  “Anyway,” he said, the smile broadening as he looked at his dongsaeng, “How’s your day going, Minnie?”Minho saw Taemin shift in his seat a bit, then shrug and say, “Eh, it’s okay.  Could be worse,” and then, “My morning classes are really boring and actually I just really want to dance right now,” when Minho raised an eyebrow in question, silently asking him to explain.  He nodded his head and reverted back to his friendly, charismatic smile.“How’s your day going, hyung?”Minho shrugged, as Taemin had done, and responded with, “Eh, it’s okay.  Could be worse.”  He gave the younger a knowing, playful smirk, amusement glinting in the depths of his eyes at the way Taemin rolled his eyes and let a small chuckle escape.  “Haha, very funny.  Two can play at that game.”  The smaller light-brunette then crossed his arms over his chest and raised an elbow at the elder, goofily imitating what had just moments ago been the look on Minho’s face.A small laugh managed to escape the latter before he answered.  “Well,” he said, trying to repress another laugh, “My morning classes are really boring and actually I just really want to dance right now.”  He smirked victoriously at the look on Taemin’s face.  The younger had pursed his lips and frowned.  “Yah, don’t mock me,” he said after a moment.  Minho, in turn, stuck his tongue out playfully at the younger, who stuck his tongue out back in reply – at least until he saw the look Jongin was throwing him.It was intense and fiery, the glare settled in so deep and sharp that it took Minho by surprise.  He hadn’t said a word to the kid, but here he was getting glared at so hard that he was sure if looks could kill, he’d have been six thousand feet underground by now.  He furrowed his brow and cocked his head in question at the dark-haired boy, who made a small scoffing sound and turned his head back to talking to his blond friend, causing Taemin to snap his head over to look at him.  Minho’s scowl deepened in confusion.Out of the corner of his eye, he could see his dongsaeng now staring at him with his own confused look on his face.  He turned to face the younger again, seeing the ‘Why’d he do that?’ in his eyes and giving him a shrug in response.  Silence fell between them for a long while, bits and pieces of Donghae and Hyukjae’s conversation and Jongin’s conversation with his friend floating around them as they awkwardly glanced around the room.It felt like they were in the process of passing through another eternity when Hyukjae snapped them out of it.  “Yah, what happened to you two all of a sudden?  Just a few minutes ago you were cackling like schoolgirls and making fun of each other like little kids and now you’re just sitting there bored with your lives.”  Minho pursed his lips to the side and looked over at Taemin, who let his eyes roam around the room for a moment before meeting Minho’s.  More silence passed between them as they just stared at one another.  Minutes ticked by in that same awkward silence, except that now Hyukjae and Donghae were in on it, watching and waiting for something, anything, to happen.Minho glanced over at the other two and saw that they were staring intently at him.  Donghae frowned as Hyukjae raised an eyebrow.  “Really,” Donghae inquired after a moment.  “You’ve always been the silent type but not when you’re around people you’re comfortable with.”The burning in Minho’s face told him he was blushing; he hurriedly hid his face behind his hands, whining out an embarrassed, “hyung.”He heard Taemin laugh and he felt the burning in his cheeks instantly intensify.  He was sure the tips of his ears put tomatoes to shame at this point.  “Yah, quit laughing at me,” he muttered in half-hearted embarrassment, for in truth he found his dongsaeng’s laughter particularly endearing.It’s just because he’s so young, he told himself when the idea that he was being startlingly creepy in thinking about how cute the kid was popped into his brain.  It’s because he’s a cute kid and he’s kind of like the younger brother I never had.  Yeah.  That’s it.He peeked through his fingers at the boy still laughing in front of him, cherubic cheeks painted a light pink from lack of oxygen and a hand over his widely-grinning mouth.  He felt his heart stop beating and then slam against his ribcage in the most pleasant of ways.  It’s just because he’s a cute kid, it’s just because he’s a cute kid, it’s just because he’s like the little brother that I never had.For some reason, his musings seemed unconvincing even to himself.  He frowned and shut his eyes tightly, feeling his thoughts overwhelm him yet again.  Why do I find him cute?  It’s because he’s like the little brother I never had, right?  It’s because he’s so young and adorable and still full of aegyo, right?  It’s because for some reason I want to protect him and make sure nothing hurts him.  Maybe it’s because he’s so cute that I want to protect him, and maybe I only think he’s cute because he’s so young.His mind circled around and around and around, cycling into his thoughts from the previous night and bringing them into the boiling pot of ‘Why am I feeling the way I’m feeling?’ that was swirling in his head.  Minutes passed, he was sure, with him in the same position, quietly sitting and still slightly blushing, thinking about why his mind was such a jumbled mess.  It’s just because he’s my dongsaeng, and I finally actually have a dongsaeng, not just a hoobae or a younger-than-me sunbae, and even though it’s only been a month or so we’re pretty decent friends and that’s why I care for him.  Yeah.But all the while there hung the ever persistent thought that maybe, maybe, it wasn’t because Taemin was like a little brother at all.  After all, it resounded in his mind mischievously, you don’t get butterflies when you look at your little brother.  No matter how much he tried to shoo the thought away, it continued to resurface and add questions and confusions into his already ridiculously jumbled mind.It was Donghae who saved him from his thoughts again, giving him an odd sense of déjà vu from the night before.  “Yah, Choi Minho, it wasn’t that bad; quit sulking into your hands.”  Said boy blinked a few times before realizing that he actually was still staring into his hands.  He removed them from his face and blinked a few more times, readjusting his eyes to the lighting in the cafeteria, then turned and looked at his red-haired hyung.Donghae had an eyebrow raised in question at his dongsaeng, slight concern flickering through the depths of his gaze.  Minho gave him a small smile and then slapped him playfully on the arm.  “Yah!  You embarrassed me, hyung, so don’t you dare tell me that there was nothing to be sulking about!”He watched his hyung for a moment as the raised eyebrow eased into a smooth grin, and then the redhead lifted a hand and smacked the back of Minho’s head lightly.  “Yah!  Dongsaeng-ah, I am your hyung!  Don’t hit me!”Minho rubbed the back of his head, flashing Donghae a smile that was both sheepish and amused – and even more so when he heard Taemin laughing at the whole ordeal.  “Now apologize,” Donghae said humorously, pointing a mockingly accusing finger at Minho.  The latter just shrugged and smiled, remaining completely silent.  “Apologize,” Donghae repeated in a higher tone a moment later, although the glint in his eyes made it clear that he was nowhere near serious or upset.Minho mimicked yawning into his hand in response, snickering silently to himself at the way Donghae let out a small laugh before repeating, with a false note of finality in his voice, “Yah, Choi Minho you apologize right this instant or I’ll do something you won’t like!”  He raised an eyebrow at the redhead, humor evident on his face by the half-smirk, half-smile he bore.  “Something like what,” he questioned, and then laughed when Donghae froze and put a finger to his chin in mock-thought.“Um, I don’t know actually.”  There was an amused silence in which Minho watched Donghae ponder what to do, sensing Taemin and Hyukjae watching from his peripheral vision as well.  It took a total of two minutes of continuous thinking before Donghae snapped his fingers and, with wide eyes and grin, said, “I got it!  I’ll just make Taemin my preferred dongsaeng over you.”  He stuck out his tongue as he reached across the table and threw an arm around Taemin’s shoulders as best as he could from his awkward angle, his amusement evidently increasing as Minho’s face fell into a scowl.“Haha, very funny,” the latter said in response, all amusement gone from his gaze as a flame seemed to ignite itself somewhere within him – from what, he was unsure of.  All he knew was that it got worse the longer Donghae held his arm around Taemin.But why, Minho questioned himself somewhere in the rational part of his mind.  Why is it that I get the feeling that I’m jealous right now?He blinked a few times in thought, feeling his scowl fall as he began to retreat into his mind.  Again.  Jealous?  I can’t possibly be jealous.  I mean it could always be annoyance.  But then why would I be annoyed?  It’s basically the same question as being jealous; why would I be jealous?  I mean sure maybe Taemin’s my dongsaeng and I’m not cool with the idea of him liking some other guy as his favorite hyung, but who said I’m his favorite hyung in the first place?  The thought stirred a feeling within him that he almost placed as disappointment.  But then why would I be disappointed at something like that?  I’ve only known him for like a month, of course I’m probably not his favorite hyung.  If anything, he only succeeded in making himself feel worse, but he quickly shook it off in favor of pondering upon the situation at hand a bit more.Anyway, then again, he thought, I could just be feeling jealous because Donghae-hyung is the hyung I’m closest to and it’s been that way for years and I don’t want anyone taking my spot as his favorite dongsaeng.  He mulled the thought over in his head, mentally tasting it to see if it fit well.  Yeah, that’s probably it, he chanted mentally; definitely it.“Yah, Minho-ah, what is going on in that brain of yours that you keep cutting off the rest of the world?”Minho blinked and met his redheaded hyung’s dark brown eyes in slight confusion, letting the words sink in before answering with an, “Oh, sorry hyung,” and a sheepish smile.  Donghae was opening his mouth to retort and, from what Minho could see, probably question some more when the bell chimed loudly, echoing across the spacious cafeteria and putting an end to their lunch period.  Donghae’s lips formed a thin line, his brows furrowing into a frown.  Minho barely noticed.Instead, what he did notice was the way Jongin shot up from his seat, throwing a “See you, Sehun,” over his shoulder at the blond he’d been sitting with and not breathing a single word to anyone else seated at the table – including Taemin.  Minho glanced over at his dongsaeng, feeling concern well up within him at the grimace that had replaced the small smile Taemin had had just moments before.“Taemin-ah, are you okay,” he asked, mentally cursing himself when his tone seemed to come out far more worried than it should have.  Taemin gave him a weak smile and nodded as he began collecting his things and dumping his trash in the nearest bin, not a single word escaping him.“Are you sure,” Minho pressed after a moment of silence in which he just watched his dongsaeng prepare to head back to his department.  Taemin met his gaze and gave him a short nod.  “Yeah, I’m fine Minho-hyung.”  He slung his book-bag over his shoulder and flashed a smile that, surprisingly, didn’t seem all too genuine.  “I’ll see you after school, okay?  I’m heading to class.  I don’t want to be late.”And before Minho could even process what had happened, the younger was walking out of the institutional-looking cafeteria doors by his lonesome, leaving Minho to ponder why exactly he felt so worried about the fact that the boy’s smile hadn’t reached his eyes, the thoughts from the previous night and a few moments ago slamming back into his head with a vengeance. Ah, I'm so sorry!

*Bows a million times in apology*

I know this took forever, but my schedule is RIDICULOUS these days.

I'm currently on Spring Break from high school but I still have a college class and sports occupying my days T^T this chapter was supposed to have been up a few days ago but all of these schedulings made it practically impossible.

But either way, I'm here now and the new chapter is here (and I already have the next one planned out in my head and a few days off after tomorrow - like for real for real, so I can start working on that chapter as soon as I get some sleep) and yay for Minho being a confused hopeless case (and for Donghae making his appearance, that adorable little sonofagun~).

And hurray for hints at EunHae (I'm sorry, I couldn't resist).

Again, I'm so sorry guys; I'll try to have the next chapter up quicker (although I can't guarantee it, sadly T^T)

I hope you enjoyed this chapter (and this ridiculously long rant where the parenthesis are really just the tangents of my thoughts that arise as a result of my awkward lack of confidence in my ability to fully explain myself).

Love you all, Lovelies! <3

_Love Always,

ForeverLovingK(Also, follow me on tumblr guise c: [I know my background SUCKS haha]).

(Also also, I wrote a EunHae oneshot because I'm a giant bumbling idiotic mess, and you can find it here)

(Okay, okay, okay, I pinky promise I'm done now)

( Bye c: )