[M] SOMETIME AROUND MIDNIGHT (1/1)

Yunho was home before midnight, worn out and frustrated. He hated the blind dates, he hated that his mom pushed him into do it, he hated being obligated to pretend he was interested out of respect for these random girls, he hated having to hide and set private places for dates he didn’t even want to have.‘I love Jaejoong as my son, but what you two have is not natural.’The woman told those words so many times they were printed in Yunho’s mind, but It didn’t matter how many times he heard them they wouldn’t reach his heart. Jaejoong was the love of his life, and he couldn’t explain how or why, but deep in his heart he knew if the God he prayed to every night wanted Jaejoong out he would take Jaejoong out Himself. And every night what Yunho asked was for Him to never do it. Jaejoong couldn’t be taken out of his heart without his own heart falling apart too, they were one.The leader knew he would have to tell Jaejoong about his blind date and he could already predict the storm. His lover was a beautiful chaos, it didn’t matter how many times the dancer told him how much he loved him or how there was no one else but him, Jaejoong would always be insecure. He thought Yunho’s parents could influence him in every way, that someday he would meet a girl and he would marry and have his own kids and that he would be just a fading memory on his mind. After 10 years Yunho thought Jaejoong would be able to feel how sure he was about his love, but Jaejoong always doubted.Yunho went to shower to clean his mind after making the call he knew would give him a headache.With the hot water falling over his back thinking about Jaejoong he wondered if he could pull of an escape to see the singer. ‘No call, I will meet him in person, all I need today is holding him’, Yunho thought to himself and suddenly his shoulders felt lighter.Turning down the shower, he wrapped himself in a towel and went to his room to find his phone ringing. An unknown number showed up on the screen and Yunho really didn’t want to pick up, so many times he changed his number and yet the stalkers always found a way to figure it out his number. After refusing the call three times he decided to pick up to ask for them to leave him alone.- Hello?- Jung Yunho-sshi?- Who’s asking for?- Jaejoong-oppa is really drunk right now, he was falling while walking and he went inside a motel with a woman!- What?- I don’t think the woman can be trusted, she made a phone call before going in, please come and stop oppa, we don’t want a scandal! I will text you the address. Yunho thought once and twice, he called his lover but his phone was apparently out of reach. Part of him thought it was a lie to lure him somewhere, he had his fair share of encounters with crazy fans and anti-fans, and Jaejoong stans were known for despising him, his other part though kept telling him he should go and be sure Jaejoong was okay. Yunho put on the first clothes he could grab, put on an extra coat and a hoodie because he knew he couldn’t be see out at night, close to a motel, specially not with his ex-band mate. He didn’t even dry himself or his hair properly, but he still remembered to get an extra coat for Jaejoong. It was freezing cold and snow seems to be piling up on the ground every second passed.The leader was proud and thankful for having a loyal staff with him, no one asked many questions when it was about Jaejoong. Arriving there he could see Jaejoong’s car, parked totally wrong. Yunho told the driver to go, because he would drive the other’s car. He swore to the sky he would kill the guy if he was driving while drunk.It was no cheap motel; it wasn’t the best money could buy though. Yunho walked to the receptionist and along with $200 he slid on the counter for her, he asked for Kim Jaejoong. Discretion was not really something you needed to request in these places, they knew when to protect costumers and when it was okay to accept money. The girl gave him a card key with a number and Yunho rush on his steps to get there.When he got on the door he started to realize what was going on and he was afraid of getting in. Could Jaejoong really break his heart like this? Did Jaejoong even liked girls in the first place? Wasn’t himself enough to satisfy? Yunho started shaking and wondered if this was how Jaejoong felt every time he thought he could lose him; it was an awful feeling.Every second there standing Yunho was risking himself of being seen and recognized, so he held the card key on the door and opened holding his breath, trying not to think.What he saw surely made his vision go red and rage was all what he could feel. He would kill them right there right at the moment, a possessive feeling put him ready to attack, but there was still this soul crushing feeling at the bottom that could only be love and he knew he would never hurt the other even if he were abandoned and that moment he hated that feeling.The dancer said “Jaejoong.” firmly once, the name slip down from his tongue like a course. The girl covered herself up with the sheets and Jaejoong rolled to the side and started laughing. Yunho knew the guy was not in his right mind.- Yunho-sshi, have you meet my friend?Yunho ignored Jaejoong and extend his arm, in a demanding tone he started to talk with the girl.- Unlock your phone and give to me, right now!(Hey Yunho-sshi aren’t you the so polite U-know? Why are you treating my friend this way?)Yunho took the girl’s phone and searched for Jaejoong’s pics, videos or phone numbers, he found just a pic of Jaejoong in his car and deleted.- Dress yourself and go away from here, FAST! If you speak about this with anyone, I’ll finish your life do you understand me?!The girl nodded in sheer panic and left with her shoes still in her hands.Yunho turned over to face Jaejoong once again and the shorter singer was still laughing though tears were all over his face.- Where is your date Yunho-sshi? We could introduce them… have a double date? I might have one or two stories about you to tell her…The leader dressed Jaejoong while he cried, and he couldn’t make himself feel not even a tad bit of sympathy for the singer’s tears that moment. He put on Jaejoong’s shoes and finally threw the extra coat he brought on Jaejoong when he saw the blonde could take care of that himself.The tall dancer grabbed Jaejoong by the arm and the drunk guy stood in silence till the parking lot, even drunk the shortest knew better but to give them away by screaming what he wanted to scream to Yunho in public. The chill of the snowy night helped both, Jaejoog to sober up enough to walk straight and Yunho to calm his fury.- You still didn’t answer me, where is your date, Yunho-sshi?- Shut up, Jaejoong! I don’t wanna hear you right now, I can’t even look at you right now.Yunho pushed Jaejoong inside the car still carefully not to make the blonde hit his head and went to the driver’s side to drive the car himself. The warm atmosphere in the car was doing nothing good for Yunho, he could smell a woman’s perfume on Jaejoong mixed with all the alcohol he intoxicated himself with, the coat now off his head showing his disheveled hair. He was still beautiful and the dancer wanted to hit him.- Was she nice? Was she pretty, Yunho-yah?- Yes, she was the most beautiful woman I have ever saw, my mom really chose right this time. Maybe she’s the one.It was such a horrible lie, Yunho couldn’t even remember the girl’s face, not even if someone put a gun in his head, but he wanted to hurt, he wanted Jaejoong to feel what he was feeling.And the drunk guy felt, he hugged himself in the passenger’s seat and silently cried looking outside, wondering if the cold he was feeling was the weather or not.Driving to Jaejoong’s home slowly, Yunho saw the blonde half asleep, watching the snow turning into tiny drops on the glass, none of them talked anymore.             Arriving home Jaejoong walked straight in, Yunho closed the door and watched Jaejoong’s back when he undressed while walking to the bathroom. The dancer made an effort not to look and Jaejoong was not doing it to get a response from the taller singer, he was just doing because he was too broken to care.All the blonde singer wanted was to wash the night off of him, he wanted to clean his body and his mind and his heart. He wanted to feel the scalding hot water on him to seize the cold he was feeling.He felt he was losing Yunho, and he didn’t know what to say or do to stop, he knew he was never going to be good enough for Yunho or for his parents or for the world.He had to face truth, so he turned the water off, dried himself, turned on the heat and put on a big and comfy dress shirt he liked, useless to remember it was Yunho’s shirt.The leader was sitting on the couch with his head rested facing the roof with his eyes closed. His coat was off and he only had a white t-shirt and faded jeans on. Jaejoong wanted him with every part of his soul, it was maddening.The shortest singer caught the dancer by surprise sitting by his side, almost on his lap and running his hands through his shirt. Yunho jumped and stood up taking Jae’s hands off of him.-  Don’t touch me! I don’t want you to touch me!- Is she that good then…I’m sorry, I just wanted to have you one last time. I knew you would never be with me for too long or consider me to be a forever thing…Laughing of the absurd he was hearing, Yunho sounded tired and desperate. Jaejoong was really dense. Reflecting and trying to understand everything, deciding finally to be completely honest, the dancer, bared his heart open.- Jaejoong, to be honest, I can’t even remember her face. She could be an old lady or a top model or a big hairy dude for all I know, I didn’t even look at her.It’s being what, 8 years we are together? God! I have no idea why we still do that to each other. I already told you so many times that I love you. I told you I go to the blind dates because eventually my mom will give up and see I’m yours and you are mine. I always told you all of this and I would never hurt you. I’m so tired of fighting over the same things, but today...what you did today can’t be erased.- If you really love me, then why, Yunho-yah? Why can’t I touch you?            That surely brought back Yunho’s fury. How could Jaejo