The Interview of Fate (1/2)
Kim Hana rechecked her script for the upcoming interview while watching Lee Sungyeol and Kim Myungsoo chatting animatedly with goofy fond smiles on their faces. Hana is an aspiring editor for Vogue Korea magazine who has always been a very dedicated inspirit and interviewing her two biases in the group is like a dream come true. Well ignoring the fact that there is no infinite anymore because the once top idol boy group disbanded a year ago with every member going their own way. It wasn't a tragic disbandment or anything. It was somehow expected when the boys returned from enlistment, they were determined to continue as infinite but somehow it didn't work. Their fanbase wasn't that big anymore and during their two years absence, many new younger boy groups came out. They released one last comeback and made the hard decision to disband. Now, a year after disbandment all the members are successful on their own and her two biases are as successful as ever. Kim Myungsoo moved to Japan like all his fans expected and became a full time photographer and a part time model and face for many famous brands in Japan.Meanwhile, Lee Sungyeol stayed in Korea and became a variety entertainer. He even opened a second branch of his bbq restaurant. The idea to have an interview with the two past idols came to her when she knew about Myungsoo returning back Home to do the wedding pictorial of a famous CEO who happened to be an infinite fan and wished for his idol’s presence in his wedding even if as a photographer. Hana stopped revising her script to watch the myungyeol couple getting prepared and going over their own script. Oh yeah she was a hardcore myungyeol shipper back in the day and she couldn't help but seize the opportunity when her boss asked her to do the interview but originally it was only Myungsoo who her boss had in mind but Hana jumped in to suggest inviting sungyeol too. The interview will have a pictorial and she fed her boss with the idea of two hot handsome men posing together and the woman definitely liked the imaginary. Now if you ask her if she still ships them together? Of course she does!! Well…. Okay she felt a little cheated when Sungyeol announced having a girlfriend whom he is getting married to. It happened right after the disbandment approximately a year ago but you know what they say, once a shipper always a shipper. And the two best friends look absolutely lovely together right now joking around with each other and with the staff and stylists . They are wearing tailored suits that go well with the pictorial business professional theme. They already finished shooting the first half of the pictorial and about to start the interview with her. Both look happy and healthy but something is missing and she wishes she knew what it is…
Myungsoo is happy. He really is very much happy with his life and the decisions he made but there will always be one thing he regrets not doing no matter how successful he is at the moment. But he is a coward and he has to live with that. He looks at Sungyeol being his flirty self with the interviewer who turned out to be a big fan of them. Sungyeol is glowing and blooming under the attention and he looks so handsome with the faint beard he got. He always thought Sungyeol was too beautiful for a boy but after a long year not seeing him, Sungyeol decided to let his beard grow because why not? And Sungyeol can have wrinkles and white hair and dark circles and Myungsoo will still think he is the most handsome man on earth. Talk about pathetic.
Myungsoo clears his head and pays attention to the interviewer instead of staring at his best friend's side profile. She is asking them the basic interview questions, how they felt about the disbandment, what were they doing with their lives, what are their plans for the future. She asks them about the other members and wishes if they can make a reunion, he wishes that too because he missed all of them and he missed being seven, being infinite. The interview goes smoothly with him and Sungyeol taking turns in answering the questions until the unthinkable happens.
“ So, i know that you got a script but i wanted to improvise a little and i am gonna ask you a few questions out of script, are you okay with that? ”Sungyeol nods and Myungsoo hums in approval.
“ You know fans like to know more about their idols especially after missing them for so long and i would like to get to know more ”
“ Myungsoo shi, despite all the success and glamour, you must have some doubts or regrets.. Something you wished to change or something you wished to do…. So, do you have any regrets in life?? ”Myungsoo inhaled loudly, regrets……. yeah there is one big fat regret and he must control his tongue because Sungyeol is looking intently at him waiting for his answer. He looks back at him and stares in those clear honest eyes he loves so much and he is stuck back in his hopeless love for that man. A love that he should have stopped from the beginning, a love that he should have forgot in that year he escaped to Japan but neither happened.He can just be honest without disclosing anything, may be admitting his love out loud would do the trick to help him get over it.He turns away from Sungyeol and fixes his eyes on the interviewer so his resolve won't weaken
“ Actually yes i do have many regrets, many stupid decisions i made but i can't live in the past forever, i have to move on” well that was more to himself not the interviewer.
She presses back “ So have you moved on??”
He hesitates but answers anyway
“ No, not really I'm still stuck in the past ” he feels his heartbeat accelerating and he prays she will move onto Sungyeol but of course…….“ May be if you talked more about your regrets, you can move on…… do you regret being an idol?? or you regret letting someone go maybe??? ” she looks at him pointedly like she knows something and man his resolve is crumbling.Well fuck it… “ Being an idol was the best decision i made in my life but with it, i met the love of my life who i had to let go of because it would never work out, which proved to be the worst decision i made in my all 34 years of living ”Hana feels the tension building up in the room suddenly and Myungsoo is looking at her and avoiding Sungyeol’s questioning eyes so she tries to ask him this time but too late
Sungyeol suddenly feels confused and his chest tightens with many thoughts filling his mind , the love of his life? Myungsoo? when did this happen? Why he never told me about it? He couldn't stop himself from asking
“ The love of your life? Who Could she be? Why you never told me anything? Myungsoo look at me! ”
Myungsoo feels a nerve popping in his head and he turns to face Sungyeol seething his next words“ Seriously? She? Who is she? You can't be so blind and dense it has been ten years, sungyeol, ten fucking years!!
Sungyeol stammers, feeling nervous suddenly because Myungsoo’s eyes are so intense and desperate and he is afraid of what Myungsoo might say if he presses more. He has always ignored this nagging feeling and his suspicions for so long, he can't give in now…….. Well too bad Pandora box opened already and what he tried to avoid for years is literally happening right now.Myungsoo feels hopeful and exacerbated seeing Sungyeol’s expression, that bastard….. so he has always known huh? Well fuck it again!“ I have always loved you, you dumbass and you dare ask me who is she? Well fuck you!”Sungyeol’s eyes get twice their size bigger in surprise and he looks like a deer caught in headlights and he can't even stay angry at him because he looks adorable like that. And for some reason after Hana recovers from the initial shock she squeals like a pig and looks ecstatic hmmmm.After few minutes of heavy silence that is only interrupted with Hana’s giggling like a teenage fangirl, she recovers herself and suspiciously excuses herself to a bathroom break.
Sungyeol is the one avoiding his eyes right now and he feels the weight of what he has done, will he avoid me for life now? Or will he just pretend nothing happened? before he can keep thinking any further, Sungyeol grabs his hand and pulls him forcefully to the dressing room, he asks for privacy and all the staff occupying the room just leave in silence. He locks the door for extra precaution and fixes him with his gaze.“ What the hell was that! You do realize she is a reporter and that confession will go out in a fucking magazine! What were you thinking? ” Sungyeol shouts at him angrily but he can see behind that facade , he is nervous and avoiding the important issue for other nonsense because the reporter obviously won't do anything to harm them, they can sue her plus she is their fan.Myungsoo sits down calmly on a nearby chaise lounge and beckons Sungyeol to sit with him, despite his anger and obvious nervousness, he complies and sits a safe distance away from him.Myungsoo snorts and scoots closer till he corners Sungyeol and it must be the adrenaline rush because he feels so adventurous right now and he feels like kissing those plump fleshy pink lips he has always fantasized. Sungyeol is just a pile of nerves right now bc he is facing the other way trying to stay as far from his face as possible. Myungsoo raises his hand and traces Sungyeol’s lips with his fingertips and Sungyeol shivers so hard that Myungsoo feels blood rushing through his veins. It must be his wishful thinking but Sungyeol closes his eyes and gulps audibly, he relaxed a little too.Without moving his fingers from the enchanting lips Myungsoo prompts him “ look my way please, we need to talk , i can go out and pretend nothing happened and ask her to erase everything but i don't want to, i want to tell you how much i love you, how much i want to hold you,kiss you, spend the rest of my life with you and you will listen Sungyeol ”Sungyeol finally faces his way and opens his eyes and he looks so sad and sorrowful that Myungsoo feels his throat close up.“ Myungsoo please, i beg you, you can't do that to me, not now, I'm getting married in few months and you have to move on and get married too ” Sungyeol whispers the words and Myungsoo can only hear them because he is so close.“ Why you are not disgusted or shocked by my sudden confession, huh? Answer me!! ”“ I……. I always suspected that y.. you had feelings for me, i am not that blind but i never thought it was for so long and i think i didn't want to believe it ” Sungyeol is red in the face saying that and pouts slightly “ But anyway you gotta move on, you have to!! Japan has a lot of beautiful maidens and i am sure they will suit your taste ” Myungsoo snorts and is silent for a few seconds thinking how to answer that
“ Sungyeol. I got no taste because you were my first and last love, i never got to have standards or special traits in the people i date because all i have ever wanted was you……. My ideal girl was a scripted answer and you know that.Sungyeol looks unconvinced and squints his eyes at myungsoo
“ Please, you wanna tell me that you never dated anyone all these
years, you are a perverted ass for God's sake!! ” Sungyeol tries to move Myungsoo away from him but he just presses back more and cups Sungyeol’s face in his hands, well the beard feels weird for sure, Sungyeol’s cheeks were always smooth and silky albeit with acne scars. But just like all the hair on Sungyeol’s body, his beard just feels fuzzy and tickling… okay he can get used to the new feeling.Sungyeol is simply agitated by now because Myungsoo is ignoring answering him and just playing with his beard, so he is about to lash out when Myungsoo surprises him “ of course i dated other people, boys and girls alike but i started doing it seriously only when i went to Japan trying my best to finally forget you,
I …. I always held onto hope that you might love me back some day so my love just kept getting bigger and deeper with the years, but when you went public with your relationship i knew that was it. I was content just being with you, being your most important person even if only as a best friend, but finally revealing your girlfriend i knew you would finally get to be with her freely and my time with you was bound to lessen”
Myungsoo wets his dry lips watching closely how pained and sorry Sungyeol looks, well he should be that's the least he could do.
“ I went out with boys mostly in Japan thinking that may be i am just gay that's why i fell in love with you and may be a cute Japanese boy would do it but no one worked for me, no one was you, no one gets me like you do, no one makes my heart beat erratically like its gonna escape my chest like you , no one is my soulmate but you ”Sungyeol looks so small right now looking at him with eyes he only imagined in his dreams “Oh my god!! Why you never said anything out loud you idiot?? Why?? Whyyyyy??Why you waited for so long?? you know i was never brave enough to say it myself!! ” Sungyeol looks surprised by what he just said just like Myungsoo and he shies away from him again but no, not this time. Myungsoo holds his face tighter and speaks slowly
“ what do you mean? What are you saying? ” Sungyeol doesn’t answer and he warns him again
“ Sungyeol !!!!! ”