Life is fragile. One second it’s there, and in the next. Poof. Gone. Some people use that as an excuse to do any stupid thing that they can think of, because, ‘you only live once’. They feel in control and hide from their fears as Death grows closer. But some people… Some people use it as an excuse to do nothing at all. Life is weak… meaningless… You’ll die eventually anyways, so why bother. Title: Behind Closed Doors Rating: PG-15 [I guess, let me know guys if I should move it to M, okay?] Genre: Heavy Angst, Suicide Pairing: DaeJae Disclaimer: This is for the lovely ILOVEYS99, who requested DaeJae angst in the Suicide category. This probably was not what you were expecting (or maybe it was), but, thanks bb for requesting it. Surprisingly, this was exactly what I needed to focus on for the past few days, its definitely made me feel a bit lighter. [Also, Im sorry for the crappy writing style. A lot of what is included in this fic is from some of my own personal journals, so sorry again for the jarring and terrible sentence structures that you are about to witness.] Trigger Warning: THIS FIC WILL CONTAIN SUICIDE. If you are sensitive to the subject, please, dont read.    Foreword I’m in my last year of high school, and that alone should earn me some sort of reward in itself. I don’t want to be here, though. I never have, but, I made a promise to a good friend of mine that I would make it to high school. Then he made me promise that I would actually graduate and take the steps forward to make something out of the pitiful thing he calls ‘my life’.  It’s pointless though. I’ll never amount to anything. I think he knows this too, he’s just too selfish to just let me go.  I should stop wasting your time now, you’re probably rolling your eyes at me already. You are probably looking down on me like everyone has done my whole life. That’s okay though, I’m used to it.  My name is Yoo Youngjae. I officially graduated from high school three days ago, and I have finally decided to take those steps forward to make something of this worthless life. Im sick of this pain and i want it to end. It feels like Im constantly playing a game that Im destined to lose. Ive wished on every shooting star Ive ever seen, every birthday candle Ive ever blown out, every coin I’ve tossed into the well, every four leaf clover I’ve stumbled upon. I wished over and over again that I could just fall asleep and never wake up. It is 11.10 now. I think I have time for one last wish.